Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 month ago

Married and haven't had sex in 6 years? Should I finally leave?

Married my high school sweetheart, 2 kids, have spent years trying to make things better but she just ignores it and acts like everything is fine. No hugs, no kisses, no texts to ask how I am as I'm the only one who travels for work. We both work (her from home) and share our responsibilities evenly so there's no one-sided marriage going on. My sex life was so much better before marriage. I feel like I'm going to blow up from frustration one day. I have told her repeatedly I can't live this way and she just doesn't care.

11 Answers

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  • 1 month ago

    There are videos on Youtube that discuss sexless marriages. After 23 years together my SO said she has no sex drive and has no erogenous zones anymore. I['ve had medical issues but I still desire sex. She is open for me to find others but with COVID it's hard. I'm not a social butterfly anyway. Frankly, I don't know what to do. I only have a few years left and want some sex before I go. It sucks.

  • 1 month ago

    If I were you I’d leave. Sex is not just a meaningless act, it’s a form of showing love and if she doesn’t want to give you that, or even check up on you, why would you stay? If you want real love, leave so you can find someone that deserves you 

  • T J
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Its time to leave

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    I have often said that sex is overrated but this is ridiculous.  It shouldn't have been left this long.  In times past this was "spousal abandonment".  Grounds for divorce.  I don't think she is considering your interests or needs which means that at the moment there is no marriage.

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  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If you'd just walk out on two kids over sex without even attempting marriage counseling your family may be better off without you. Think about having to explain to these children when they're old enough to understand that you shattered their family because you couldn't get your rocks off often enough and were too angry to bother talking to a therapist. 

  • 1 month ago

    OK - so sit down with your wife, tell her that you will need to look at divorce options unless she agrees to attend couples therapy with you 

  • 1 month ago

    If you waited six years to address this issue you might as well start packing. Its not going to change. For you anyway.

    Reality.... any woman who can go six years without sex with you isn't going to start now.

    What IS unknown is, Has she not had sex for six years or is this just with you?

    Either way start packing.

  • ?
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If you want to satisfy yourself that you have tried everything , before giving up, go to marriage counseling, with or without her, if she refuses. The next step would be to dissolve the marriage, of course. Good luck, 

  • 1 month ago

    This is by no means unusual. She has what she wants: enough children - so she feels no need for anything physical now. This is probably not conscious or deliberate, just the nature of things. Perhaps you have been taking her for granted a bit. Stopped making the effort. 

    Now you can woo her again. Or you can read a book such as Dr Phil McGraw's excellent Relationship Rescue which helps to give us deeper insights into how relationships work. (I wish I got commission, as I recommend it to so many people!). As he writes in the book, it isn't only for people whose relationships are in trouble. There are other excellent books, of course. Or you can have a discussion with her about how you each see the future panning out. Or all of the above!

    Good Luck!

    Source(s): Jamforlife.co.uk
  • Audrey
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    If she's not willing to see a therapist, just leave. It's not fair to you to have to go without lovemaking.

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