Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsSingles & Dating · 2 months ago

Do people realize that slut shaming is linked to rape?

The guy who raped me said stuff I never talked about before with him, the only person I spoke to about it was this woman who was at his house the night he raped me. I wake up in the middle of the night and it feels like I just went through it again, it's really hard for me to fall asleep afterwards, I don't even want to sleep sometimes, and I just want to force myself to stay up all night long, I force myself to sleep. I have had a headache or a migraine for too many days, I have taken so many different pain killers, but nothing helps. I just want to stop breathing.

Update:

She’s also my friends girlfriend, she’s a reminder of what happened to me but I don't blame her, I never confronted her, I can't ever confront her because she’s terrifying.

 

Update 2:

@Ana Victim blaming needs to end, clothing does not equal consent. I wasn't dressed inappropriately, but even if I was, it doesn't give anyone the right to touch me, it is not consent. 

3 Answers

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  • 2 months ago
    Favourite answer

    That is cruel and a shame I was raped too, many of times! :'( Go find a TRAUMA THERAPIST,  as they specialize in trauma rape, physical abuse, etc. You sound like you are suffering from PTSD, so you really need to talk to a certified and licensed therapist in this department! You are most likely having bad lasting headaches due to very little sleep, being sleep deprived will cause headaches and pain pills will not help trust me! Good luck, sorry this happened to you too! Take care XOXOXO

  • ?
    Lv 6
    2 months ago

    EDIT TO YOUR EDIT: You reveal that you have a low IQ with your most recent statement. Nobody said that “clothing equals consent”. Are you actually this retarded?

    I stated that sometimes, bad people will do bad things and take advantage of you, if you put yourself into a bad situation. This doesn’t make it “your fault” and it doesn’t mean “you consented”. However, smart people tend to be better at avoiding bad situations.

    Also- The way you dress really isn’t the main factor leading to rape, either. The whole “going over to a guys house alone, late at night, who you don’t intend to f*uck yet you’re still stupidly going to his house alone” is more the reason why. 

    This doesn’t “make it okay” for rape to occur. It just states that we live in real life, not a unicorn fantasy world, and smart girls need to protect themselves instead of sitting and howling and crying like a helpless little infant. 

    ======

    TRUE FACTS: We can choose to go through life and consider ourselves unintelligent, helpless victims, or we can take charge of our situation and be smart, intelligent, and proactive. 💯 

    Rape should obviously never happen – but guess what, in real life, sometimes bad people do bad things and weak/dumb people get taken advantage of. if you put yourself into bad circumstances (such as inadvertently lead a guy on, be at a guy’s house alone with him, drink or do drugs alone with a guy, dress sl*utty, etc) then it just might lead to a rape. 

    (Does this mean “you deserved it”? Of course not! But you made bad choices that allowed someone to take advantage of you.)

    Robberies should never happen either! But I sure don’t make a habit of walking around the Bronx at 2 AM with hundred dollar bills hanging out of my pocket while wearing a Donald Trump shirt. Because I‘m not trying to be robbed!

    (Would I “DESERVE IT” if I was robbed? No, of course not! Robbery is a terrible thing too, and nobody deserves to be robbed. But perhaps my actions of walking around a dangerous area at night with huge chunks of cash, without a firearm for protection, put me in that dangerous situation?) 

    Customers not paying your business should never happen- for this reason, I would never do a job for a customer without having a signed contract and having their email, phone, and home address so I know who they are. I’m smart! I try to avoid bad situations! 

    I recommend not going over to a guy’s house alone, unless you are dating him, know him well, and are fully OK with having sex with him at that time. That way, if he DOES initiate sex, there won’t be an issue! 

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    You need to seek therapy to heal yourself.  Rape is traumatic...you deserve relief from the after effects of this trauma.  You were the victim, the rapist is the person who should be suffering, not you!  Time to stop torturing yourself, speak to a therapist to get a handle on your life.  Good luck.

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