Responsible work place behavior?

I have a job I used to love. The pay wasn’t substantial but it was fun and I was learning a lot. My coworkers were great, and it was positive at first. 

The real problem was my boss. He was this pseudo Christian salesman who in front of people was kind but behind closed doors was verbally abusive. During my performance review he told me I lacked common sense, critical thinking, told me 18 year olds could do my job, and things need to move faster because “where I’m from” people could afford to be slow (I’m from a small town in the south and I live out west now in a city) and was just generally nasty. I have an encyclopedic knowledge of the product and basically run the store by myself. This was days before Christmas last year. 

Should I resign? Or is part of being a responsible adult taking abuse? 

12 Answers

  • 2 months ago

    Go halfway to the conclusion here. Take the responsibility for what you CAN improve and lock up your abusive boss's comments into a file for later use. And start looking for another job as soon as you can manage it. You are NOT obligated to continue to suffer such demeaning reviews. Even if you made mistakes, or did not show a lot of common sense, or were slow, your boss was out of line. However, you can't levy anything against him. You don't have the authority. Keep a file on what he said and how it was said, though. Keep it at HOME--or keep it from being found at work in some way. If you need it later, you'll have it documented. 

    As a boss, he should have DIRECTED you better--or given you ways you could improve. But unfortunately, that's not always what bosses do. GOOD ones do. But a lot don't. Handling someone like this is not an easy or necessarily productive task, though. It takes a lot more experience and finesse than you have right now. And it creates hostility that you may not be able to overcome. Look for some other place you can be treated with more dignity. But ALWAYS document any time a boss or co-worker is abusive verbally or physically. 

    Source(s): Worked in HR for 31 years.
  • a
    Lv 4
    2 months ago

    Aww, hon. First job?

    Christian or not, informing you of your shortcomings and telling you how to improve your job performance isn't abuse. 

    Part of being a responsible adult is to understand that *everyone* can improve his or her job performance.

    What's interesting and bewildering and sad is that in eleven months, you've done nothing but stew about this. You say nothing about how you've improved your speed or critical thinking. Speaking of resigning during a pandemic without having another job lined up pretty much confirms a lack of common sense. 

  • L
    Lv 5
    2 months ago

    The boss can say anything he or she wants.  If you love your job..........listen to the criticism, improve yourself, move on and stop whining.

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    You're an adult, right? if you are asking this question then you know in your gut that something is off and this type of of treatment from your boss is wrong and unprofessional.

    I would leave if I were you. But also look for a job BEFORE quitting. Never quit a job unless you have another one lined up. 

    Also, look to see if you can report your manager. Maybe somehow record him when he is speaking like this to you.. 

    It's 2020, any type of abuse, even if it's verbal, is still considered harrasment, and is illegal. 

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  • John
    Lv 6
    2 months ago

    "Should I resign? Or is part of being a responsible adult taking abuse?"  

    The answer is neither.  Quitting before you have another job is not responsible adult behavior.  Neither is simply staying at a bad job.  Start looking for new employment now.  I strongly suspect that, if the bad evaluation was true, you would have been dismissed by now.  Your boss is most likely very satisfied with both your job performance and your low pay.  

  • 2 months ago

    As adults, we all take abuse at some time. I would ride with the situation for a while and, if things didn't improve, or got worse, start looking for another job.

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Being a responsible adult means you can make this decision yourself.

    Have a nice day in Trollville.

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    Kudos to you for sticking around this long - sounds like you'll be having another review soon. Don't up and quit at this point - build your resume. Be grateful to have a job during this pandemic. 

    Perhaps the company has suppliers, competitors, or customers that might be a good fit? Perhaps you can research them online (not at work!) to see whether they could use someone like you, discretely, without your boss finding out? 

    Whatever you do, don't EVER trash your boss, even after you leave. Say it was a great learning experience and you appreciated the opportunity. 

    And don't worry about anyone saying you lack common sense - Common Sense is Uncommon - which they just proved by saying that to you!

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago

    That is constructive criticism, not abuse.

  • Tavy
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    So this was last year, what has happened this year?

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