Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 month ago

Dilemma between 2 men!!! Need advice please?

So I am a 43 year old woman with one son. I am back into the dating world and there two men interested in me. I went on a few dates with each and they are both nice. Guy A is divorced with one son. Guy B doesn't have kids and wants to have one. 

If I become more serious with guy A then I get to be a step mom and possibly have  the ex-wife in my life( although they aren't on the best terms). If I become more serious with guy B I may end up with another biological child after my 43 years. 

I don't know which is better. Leaving their character aside( both nice) what is the worst situation to be in? Please help. 


I am in the initial stages of dating. I am not in love with anyone yet. But I do feel it's time to concentrate on one and I just don't know which one. PS i am not having sex with either one

6 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    Too many unknowns to make a call - how much of Guy A's income and pension goes to support or alimony - and when does it end.  No telling how well it will go with the ex another big unknown. How long has he been divorced? 3-4 years you probably are in the clear that the ex has moved on, One, two years there is likely some ill will that will manifest itself occasionally, especially concerning the kids. Kids tend to be weilded like a sword too often as a threat. 

    Guy B - why hasn't he married before, does his back story check out. Any guy who wants a kid is of reasonably good standing should have had a pick of potential wives. So I would be extra careful with that one - he has no idea about the amount of responsibility it takes to raise a child much less in a household where one of the kids isn't his. You may not like his parenting style.

  • 1 month ago

    Neither. Sounds like you are more interested in hypothetical outcomes than who you have a better connection with or who would be a better partner. Yes, these are scenarios to keep in mind, but you should work on getting to know the guys more first.

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    A 43-year old woman who needs strangers to direct her dating life has no business raising a child and/or dating.

    You really think that both of these men are going to propose marriage, and you will have to choose between them?  Really?  Based on a handful of dates?

    I'd drop both of them and search for someone else.

  • 1 month ago

    What do you have to decide? Marriage? Dating? You don't mention love or emotions; are these not important to any of you?

  • What do you think of the answers? You can sign in to give your opinion on the answer.
  • 1 month ago

    So, your dating 2 men at once, and trying to figure out which one is the best?   Are you serious?     Yeah ,...  how about you close your legs and learn to date one man at a time. 

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Bang with both of them and see who’s the best 

    That’s all you need at this age since you getting old and will not find a much younger dude

Still have questions? Get answers by asking now.