Lv 6
larry1 asked in Social SciencePsychology · 1 month ago

Help with psychological diagnosis?

Adult 'normal' suburban person. She's in common trivial argument, not heated and all of sudden goes into the most vile/ exorcist like verbal abuse. You can't believe what's coming out of her mouth and call her on it. It's just 2 seconds later she looks you in the eyes and denies that she just said that! You of course protest. She blinks and totally changes subject to some trivial thing that happened years ago that you did and says how outraged she was etc. Then she goes on a 2 hour rant on 'that' topic so you can't talk or complain about what she just did/ said, working herself up into a red and purple faced rage trying to get you to engage on that topic till you get tired and just go away. 

Then later on in recounting the incident to you and others...she'll say 'you' started the big argument about the trivial thing years ago. That she never said the things she said and never would,... and 'your' delusional. 

Here's the thing, she really believes it! She could pass a polygraph! 

She believes her own lies.

It seems she uses her self induced rants to erase her own memory and plant false memories she then believes true. All to cover up her abuse toward others and out of control temper. 

So, what do you think? What personality/psych condition?


11 Answers

  • 1 month ago

    God is real and He loves you. John 3.16. Seek God and then build so life can bloom further. He also has great plans for you Jer 29.11

  • 1 month ago

    The person is neurotic and suffers from a personality disorder. There are many individuals who suffer from manic depressive disorder. 

    They will go into a mania episodic phase with delusional thinking and lash out at anyone they have a close relationship with. 

    The other alternative is that she is just a vindictive and spiteful female who is projecting all her pent up rage and emotional wounds onto you.

  • 1 month ago

     It's not professional but it this it's manipulative and a gaslighter.

  • Lili
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    We are not psychologists or psychiatrists and can't diagnose her.  You are not going to get a serious professional diagnosis here, and professionals wouldn't diagnose someone they didn't know anyway.

    Either avoid this person or, if she is a relative, get her into psychiatric care.  Surely other people she deals with have had to deal with the same behavior? If so, it must be interfering with her ability to function normally.

    If not, if she's functioning perfectly well with everyone but you, I'd suggest that you distance yourself from her as much as possible and just shrug off the weird behavior. That's the best you can do.

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  • 1 month ago

    Sounds like you would be better off tossing that crazy one and find a new one.  There are plenty out there.  Don't get your finger stuck in the knot hole of a nut tree when there is an entire forest of trees out there.  Try many of them and see which one has a knot hole that is a perfect fit for your finger.

  • Carmen
    Lv 5
    1 month ago

    Pray she doesn’t hurt herself or someone else if she has been diagnosed with a mental medical issue as mentioned because in that state of mind anything is possible. Patience is definitely needed along with showing some tender affection and consideration on your part of you want to be her friend or be around her. Unforeseen circumstances befall is all sometimes. Keep a calm heart and your peace of mind what you can control. 

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    Signs to Look for in an Abusive Personality

    Many people are interested in ways to predict whether they are about to become involved with someone who will be physically abusive. 

    Below is a list of common behaviors that are seen in abusive people. Many victims do not realize that these early behaviors are warning signs of potential future physical and emotional abuse, If the person has several (three or more) of the first 12 listed behaviors, there is a strong potential for physical violence, the more signs a person has, the more likely the person is a batterer. In some cases, a batterer may only have a couple of behaviors that the victim can recognize, but they may be very exaggerated, and a victim may be flattered at first. However, as time goes by, the behavior becomes more severe and serves to dominate and control the victim.

    1. Jealousy: At the beginning of a relationship, an abuser will always say that jealousy is a sign of love; jealousy has nothing to do with love, it is a sign of possessiveness and lack of trust. They will question the other person about whom you talk to, accuse you of flirting, or be jealous of the time you spend with your family or friends. As the jealousy progresses, they may call frequently during the day or drop by unexpectedly. They may refuse to let you work for fear that you may meet someone else, or even do strange behaviors including checking your car mileage, checking your phone text messages, incoming and outgoing calls, social media messages, or asking friends to watch you.

    2. Controlling Behavior: At first, the batterer will say that this behavior is because they are concerned with your safety, your need to use your time well, or your need to make good decisions. They will be angry if you are late coming back from wherever you were, they will question you closely about where you went and whom you talked to. As this behavior gets worse, they may not let you make personal decisions. 

    3. Quick Involvement: Many people in abusive relationships dated or knew their abusive partners for less than six months before they were married, engaged or living together. They come on like a whirlwind, claiming, “You are the only person I could ever talk to” or “I’ve never felt like this for anyone before. They will pressure you to commit to the relationship in such a way that you may later feel guilty or that you are “letting them down” if you want to slow down involvement or break up.

    4. Unrealistic Expectations: Abusive people will expect their partner to meet all their needs; they expect you to be the perfect boyfriend/girlfriend, the perfect friend or the perfect lover. They will say things like, “If you love me, I’m all you need and you are all I need.” You are supposed to take care of all of their emotional needs as they neglect yours.

    5. Isolation: The abusive person will try to cut you off from all resources. They accuse you of being “tied to your mother,” or your friends of “trying to cause trouble” between you. If you have a friend of the opposite sex, you are “going out on him or her out.”

    6. Blames Others for Problems: They are chronically unemployed, someone is always waiting for them to do wrong or mess up or someone is always out to get them. They may make mistakes and blame you for upsetting them. They may accuse you of preventing them from concentrating on something, anything. They will tell you that you are at fault for almost anything that goes wrong.

    7. Blames Others for Feelings: They will tell you, “You make me mad,” “You are hurting me by not doing what I want you to do,” or “I can’t help being angry.” They really make the decisions about how you think or feel, but will use feelings to manipulate you.

    8. Hypersensitivity: An abusive person is easily insulted, and claims that their feelings are hurt when they are very angry. They often take the slightest setbacks as personal attacks. They will rant about things that are really just part of living like being asked to work overtime, getting a traffic ticket, being asked to help others with chores.

    9. Cruelty to Animals or Children: This is a person who punishes animals brutally or is insensitive to their pain and suffering. They may tease younger brothers or sisters until 

    they cry.

    10.“Playful” use of Force in Sex: This kind of person is likely to throw you down or try to hold you down during making out, or he may want you to act out fantasies in which you are helpless. He is letting you know that the idea of sex is exciting. He may show little concern about whether you want affection and may sulk or use anger to manipulate you into compliance.

    11. Verbal Abuse: In addition to saying things that are meant to be cruel and hurtful, this can be seen when the abusive person tries to degrade you, curses you, calls you names or makes fun of your accomplishments. The abusive person will tell you that you are stupid and unable to function without him. This may involve waking you up to verbally abuse you or not letting you go to sleep until you talk out an argument.

    12. Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde: Many people are confused by their abusive partner’s “sudden” changes in mood -- you may think they have a mental problem because they are nice one minute and the next minute they are exploding. Explosiveness and moodiness are typical of people who are abusive to their partners, and these behaviors are related to other characteristics like hypersensitivity.

    13. *** Past Battering: This person may say that he has hit girlfriends in the past but the other person “made him do it.” You may hear from relatives or past girlfriends that he is abusive. An abusive person will be physically abusive to any one they are with if the other person is with them long enough for the violence to begin; situational circumstances do not change a person into an abuser.

    14. *** Threats of violence: This could include any threat of physical force meant to control you: “I’ll slap you,” “I’ll kill you,” or “I’ll break your neck." Most people do not threaten their partners, but the abusive person will try to excuse his threats by saying, “Everybody talks that way.”

    15. *** Breaking or Striking Objects: This behavior is used as a punishment (breaking loved possessions), but is mostly used to terrorize you into submission. The abuser may beat on the table with his fists, throw objects at or near you, kick the car, slam the door or drive at a high rate of speed or recklessly to scare you. Not only is this a sign of extreme emotional immaturity, but there is great danger when someone thinks they have the “right” to punish or frighten you.

    16. *** Any Force During an Argument: This may involve an abusive partner holding you down, physically restraining you from leaving the room, any pushing or shoving. He may hold you against the wall and say, “You are going to listen to me.”

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago

    I hope you don't expect to get any "professional" advice here. What with all the trolls and all. It is also unethical for a licensed professional to diagnose any cases here.

  • 1 month ago

    Sounds like straight up unresolved trauma from narcissist abuse, not at all trivial, possibly involving mind control and the spirit realm, if you believe in that stuff.  I know of a shaman that could help, if you are interested.  Seems to me that you are the narcissist.  That crap is going to follow you for lifetimes to come if you think you're going to get away with calling it trivial.

  • 1 month ago

    She's a Southern Belle.  That's from the DSM-V.

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