Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

what am i going to do once my mum and dad are no longer around?

i just had an argument with my mum on the phone, it was about how i drain her with my worries and mental health problems, and i defended myself by saying i can't help having anxiety, worry and mental health problems...anyway, my mum put the phone down on me, it got quite heated.....but this is just one of many thousands of arguments we've had throughout life, its very bitter sweet with me and my mum.....but i love her with all my heart, and she says constantly how she loves me with all her heart.........but i'm in my early 40s now and my mother is elderly.....she lives far away from me...i live in a council flat by myself............and i wonder what i'm going to do once my mum is no longer around?

what unbearable agony will i have to live with then? mum and dad are the only support i have, especially my mother, i have never made any outside relationships, because i had so many problems, not just mental ones....i already live a very lonely life, but once my mum leaves me it will throw me completely on my own......i also live with type 2 diabetes which i acquired years back..

my mum was supposed to be calling down to visit me next friday, but with tonights argument, i'm wondering if thats off now.....i feel completely in the dark mentally at the moment, so upset that i upset my mother, so alone, miserable and lonely.

can anyone offer any words of just niceness and hope?


bluebonnetgranny - thankyou for answering, so sorry to hear of your troubles.

Update 2:

Anonymous - thankyou for your words and for answering and your message of hope.

3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    You realize your mum won't be around forever.  Sorry to say but I think you put your mum through enough, and by her putting the phone down, clearly she's had enough of the arguments.  This, right now, is your chance to finally change.  You've spent a lot of your life dealing with your problems and going to her to vent. So now, work on yourself. Try to make some changes, because if you do, nothing else would make your mum happier.  Hopefully she has some time left, and I'm sure she'd be thrilled to actually see that you've tried to better yourself before it's too late.  Even though this answer might not be what you want, maybe you can see that there is hope for you.

  • 1 month ago

    This is something we all have to go through, and each of us handles it as best we can, in our own way. If you are this worried ahead of time, perhaps you ought to be in therapy with a professional , licensed counselor, who can help you through this. You have now  received over 18, 235 replies to this and other questions. Again, talking to a counselor might do you more good than posting your anxieties here. Do know that Yahoo Answers will be shutting down permanently in December, so you should really make some other plans now. 

  • 1 month ago

    This hits just too close to home.  I lost my mom almost two yrs ago & siblings & I are fighting horribly over sorting through her belongings.  It is far more than just sorting through her things, it is also how she was treated by the sibling that has power of attorney/care giver.  That sibling violated moms wishes & coerced & manipulated mom into giving her the family house.  They were even taking things from the house before mom died.  So much HATE, so many wishes that she was out of the picture or dead.  now everything is on hold cause of covid.  I was even attacked by two siblings, I am 72 yrs old & I hate my siblings.  Just had to share cause it hit a touchy point in the loss of my mother.

    Tell your mom anything you feel you need to say to her.  I did not get a chance to say good bye cause of siblings. 

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