Have you disconnected from a close relative? ?

My brother is 29 his wife is 23. They live with my grandma. They couldn’t afford to pay half the bills so they had my grandmother pay for everything. She came to me upset that she was worried she needed to pick up a job to afford the bills. She’s 82. So I moved in divided the bills into two for me and my brother and his wife. They agreed. It’s been hell fighting with them. They try to run her over with getting away of not paying rent or asking for money. I won’t back down and it’s exhausting. His wife tells her mom what a horrid person I am and one day after I got of work I had a wonderful voicemail from her mom telling me what a pos I am. 

Things calmed down we started to coexist as long as they knew grandma was not helping them anymore. We were good. I go out of town for two days, grandma said she gave them 20$ before they left for food and asked them to bring her something. They called her at ELEVEN AT NIGHT! Asking if she still wanted something. She said no she just made a fried egg. They didn’t give her the money back. Tonight I’m home and I told her maybe they will bring her something. They didn’t and still didn’t give the money back. My grandma said she wasn’t going to give them money anymore. 

So my relationship with my brother is dead. I want nothing to do with him I absolutely despise him. My grandma won’t kick him out, and she doesn’t want to move with me. So I feel trapped with guilt. If I move i know they will just take advantage of her again. I’m going crazy. 

3 Answers

  • Anonymous
    2 months ago
    Favourite answer

    🥴 For your grandmas sake, stay there. Do not let up and don't back down. 

    This is why we torture our inlaws where I'm from. 

    If you let up, they'll take over everything you have and push around your entire family.

    Find a way to kick the wife out. If your brother has to go, so be it.

    Her and her mother are trying to intimidate you.

    But we have one simple rule we live religiously by, here. 

    In laws have no place to speak in your blood relatives household.

    Shut her up.

  • Tj
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    Time for them or you to move out. Give grandma no choice, put them out or she moves with you, if you are not sharing the load.

  • 2 months ago

    your grandma, even old, is still an adult and should be able to take care of her finances, unless she is senile or has altzheimer. it is not like they hold her at a gun point and demand money from her. she is willingly gives if they ask. is your brother wrong for asking? yes. but your grandma can always say no. i think u re taking too much on your shoulders. it is nice u spend time with her and help her out, but u shouldn't stop living just because u think your brother is taking advantage of her. if u want to move on your own u should. and i doubt anyone will take your grandma to work for them anyway

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