Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 1 month ago

Clashing with parent over messy house? What should I do?

I’m 26 year old male living with my 60 year old mom (want to move out but currently saving for a flat). 

In the last 10 years I have always cleaned and arranged ornaments and made the house look nice. My mom isn’t fussed about any of it but I have always liked interior and keeping things tidy.

Anything I ever did and still do lasts about 2-3 days before it is either rearranged in a messy way or broken. It has always been like this. 

Due to corona and been off work I have spring cleaned the house and got things looking organised and clean. Pretty proud of what I did and my mom was very unappreciative. And within 3 days it’s all gone back to being messy and untidy. 

I’m just starting to think am I wasting my time? And why is she doing this? I feel that she could be playing mind games with me and it feels like a form of mental abuse. She is very stubborn. I am exhausted and the things she does wind me up so badly I get very angry easily and shout, which she responds with “well move out then”. So our arguments always end the same. With me being told to move out. 

We regularly talk about doing home improvements together but she would need me to pay for everything.. I want to but also think it would be very stupid of me to pay after the way she treats me. 

Or am I being too sensitive and does she have that right to be like this as technically it is her house. 

Shall I stop?  

2 Answers

  • Tj
    Lv 7
    1 month ago
    Favourite answer

    Why pay for anything in her house, save your money and get your own place. Let her have her mess, it is not your place.

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    maybe you should move out

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