Elio asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 2 months ago

How did you move out of your Parent's house?

So i'm in my 20's and I've always wanted to move out but I can't because I help support my family and take care of my grandparents. I'm having a hard time making and saving money because bills are too expensive. I worked to get myself to college but I dropped out because I can't pay for school and for all the bills at the same time. And I have to take care of my grandparents because no one else will. Even if me and my father are the one's making money we still struggle paying for all of it. There's 7 of us living in 1 roof. With 2 large and 1 small dog. It came to a point where I can't even buy myself new clothes because I have to give up all my salary to help  pay the bills or the daily expenses. I rarely go outside unless it's for work because transportation is too expensive even for me now. I can't even be in a relationship nor hang out with friends because I just don't have time. I'm so stressed and depressed. Has anyone experienced this? And how did you dealt with it?

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    Sounds like some of these other household residents might need to get jobs. Unless these are all children they should either be working or drawing some kind of benefit. There's also the consideration that if you have aging grandparents who need constant care they may be better off in an assisted living situation.

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  • Pearl
    Lv 7
    1 month ago

    i went away to college

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  • 2 months ago

    I just started living under a bridge on the freeway.  Life is much better now.  I increased my quality of life by 95% AND I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to not giving a fvck!

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  • 1) Started working to earn money when I was 12-13 years old.

    2) Went off to university after finishing high school; had saved money working multiple jobs while in high school. My parents divorced as I was finishing high school; my mom moved back to France and my dad stayed in our home.

    3) Graduated, started working, lived in crap apartment barely scraping by. Worked a second job for cash.

    4) Changed careers (journalism doesn't pay), moved back to my home town for work and to help my father out (he was having health issues; he's since deceased) now make mid-six figures.

    • Elio2 months agoReport

      I'm sorry to hear about your Father. You struggled and worked really hard. I admire you for that. Thank you for sharing.

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  • 2 months ago

    You are accepting obligations that are not fair. You are being taken advantage of by your family. Open a bank account, and put half your paycheck in the bank every payday, and contribute the rest to your family. If any one asks, you earned it and you can decide what to do with it. When you have enough to move out and rent or share an apartment, say goodby. Then go to school, and keep all of the money you earn. You are being robbed of  your life by people who are contributing nothing. That's just not fair.

    • Elio2 months agoReport

      I should do that. Thank you for the advice. You're very kind.

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  • Will
    Lv 7
    2 months ago

    I am 25 and just bought my first house two weeks ago. The difference between you and I is that I am not a slave to the family. I know you feel like you have to help them, but you need to look after yourself as well and your future. You should not be responsible for taking care of your grandparents or any relative that is previous in generation to you in the family tree. Look at this possible future scenario. Once your grandparents are gone, you will be free, right? Wrong. You will be free but you will have no money and therefore still need to live with your parents. And this could be when you're 40 or 50. I know this is hard to consider, but you need to stand up and tell them, "I can't do this anymore. I need to be independent and prepare for my future." They are all dragging you down. If you come from a poor or at least less financially stable family, tell them that you didn't want to be born into this scenario. And that the cycle will repeat until someone makes a change. And that change is you looking out for yourself and no longer them. You deserve to have a social life and life in general. Not be a slave to the family's troubles. 

    If you want my advice, I would find the nearest commercial driving school, get a Class A CDL, learn air brakes, obtain the hazmat, tanker, and passenger endorsements and find a local job. CDL school usually costs no more than $2000; a student loan you can easily get approved for. You don't even need to drive a tractor trailer (Class A required). You could drive a straight truck instead. A straight truck is anything from a garbage truck to 16ft flatbed to buses. I would suggest driving for a garbage company because you will start off with no less than a 40K salary. Or find a local company that does wholesale distribution. For example, my employer purchases industrial containers such as metal drums, tins for paint, and plastic containers for chemicals and then other businesses buy those containers from us. My job is making those deliveries. Or you can go King of the Hill and find a propane supplier and drive for them. Again, I am sure it's hard to think about abandoning your family, but you must do so if you want to become successful and independent.

    If you guys are so tight on money, why the **** do you have dogs? They are the first things that need to go. That's like buying a new smartphone every year. The dogs are not a necessity. They are a Want, not a Need. 

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    • Elio1 month agoReport

      That's a very good way to say it. I'll tell them that once I get out of here. Thank you so much, Will. You're very kind.

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  • 2 months ago

    i just got financial aid and went away to college

    • Elio2 months agoReport

      That's nice

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