Anonymous asked in Social SciencePsychology · 8 months ago

Is it wrong to be pro 'different' and still have or vent thoughts with anti 'different' thing?

Like be pro gay and have homophobic thoughts or vent them to get through them and get to the other side of equity or equality. I just feel like I want to be pro gay and I try to go straight to the source and just say I am pro gay and think "I love gay people." But then I get the "I hate gay people" thoughts coming up because I have internalized homophobia. Can I go through and think the homophobic thoughts without acting on them to vent them and still be pro gay? Same with black people. I am black and gay.

2 Answers

  • 8 months ago

    I think this "phobe" thing is a mis-representation. Phobia means fear. Most people in the population are turned off by homosexuality. They just are, that's the statistics. But it's disgust, not fear. Homophobia is, imo, a politically made-up term, placing blame on people who are naturally turned-off by homosexuality and mis-characterizing their disgust as fear. We each, you included, can feel however we feel - in fact we have no choice in the matter. But I just wish it would be more honestly represented. It's not fear. The correct term should be homoaidia, not homophobia.

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  • abcdef
    Lv 7
    8 months ago

    We all have our private prejudices.  You are aware of yours and you're trying hard to not verbalize them, but you still think them.  The way to overcome your prejudices against certain groups of people is to get to know some of those individuals well.  As you say, you have "internalized homophobia" probably from an early age.  You have been socialized - same with your anti-black sentiments.  From your last statement (which I almost missed) there is a great deal of self-hatred going on here.  You may want to examine really closely the origins of these sentiments.  Where did they come from?  How have people in your past influenced you to feel this way about not only other gay and/or black people, but about yourself as well.  A good therapist can help you find the origins and then you can deal with them.  This is not strictly speaking about homophobia or anti-black sentiment, this is about self-acceptance.  Good luck.

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