how does one get over the fear of rejection?

serious replies wanted.

it's just i'm a man in my early forties and my life didn't turn out that well or the way i wanted, ive had severe mental problems to deal with and i had never found any female relationships....most encounters ive had with females i had been rejected, because i didn't know how to act? and i put myself over as too needy, clingy, and desperate and frightened them away..

over the last 6 months ive added this lady in her mid 50s to my friends on facebook, i forget how i discovered the lady, but she has shown an interest in me....and we have been messaging each other on facebook..........but usually i have been taking weeks to reply because i'm scared i'll put the wrong thing, come across too needy/clingy and scare her off....and i'll be rejected....and ive started to like her.

this woman is my type too, a natural redhead, big and pale, but not overweight.

she replied to my message weeks ago, but i haven't checked her reply yet because i'm worried i won't know what to reply with or i'll cause her to reject me....i'm not confident in putting myself across to women at all...and i'm frightened of rejection etc but i do really like her....but i don't know how to take the 'chat' forward?

the bottom line is i'm scared of rejection or saying the wrong thing through neediness.

my last message to her was 'hi are you getting ready for christmas?'

can anyone help?

2 Answers

  • 8 months ago
    Favourite answer

    You try too hard to look not-clingy. If a guy doesn't reply to my texts for even a few days, I'll decide he's not interested and finds me annoying. And you talk about weeks. To answer your question - you'll never stop feeling the fear of rejection, it'll always be there. The question is: Are you going to act upon what your fear says? Or are you going to ignore it, get back up and try again?

    • thanks i understood, and i will keep trying, i suppose its only by trying i can gain this confidence i so desire and the fear of rejection will lessen, thankyou very much for answering.

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  • martin
    Lv 7
    8 months ago

    If you've found someone who makes you happy, then keep up the chat. Some day, you could arrange to meet.

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