I'm ready to date again, but I'm still scared. What should do I?

Hi, so, I'm a 25 year old woman who's been through a rough patch in life.

  • Abusive ex that I lived with for a year and a half

  • Living with my mother now that I finally got out of that situation

  • Working my way through college

So, I've been living with Mom for about 7 months now. My savings is looking good. I'm looking at apartments again, and I'm moving up in the workplace. Life is good. I even reconnected with an old friend from high school/college (my first Technical College before I transferred) and we actually hit it off. We're not dating, but it's almost like we're in a relationship, but we don't have a title.

He asked me about it, because this has been going on for a couple months, and I became terrified. I don't understand why. I mean, I have gone through bad experiences with my ex, but my friend is a wonderful man. Hardworking, family oriented, and he cares about me deeply, as do I.

I would LOVE to be in a relationship with him and to make it official, but something is holding me back. It feels almost like there's a string hanging out my back, and every time I'm about to take a leap of faith and try to make things official with him, I feel a little tug and I stop myself.

How can I get over there feelings and just do for it? How did I go about dating again when I'm still scared of getting hurt?

4 Answers

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  • 10 months ago
    Favourite answer

    You're most of the way there. You recognize that fear of rejection is what is holding you back. Face that fear logically, rationally and with great optimism. When you're on the other side, tell your guy that you're a couple.

  • 8 months ago

    I would say that Kaylee is wrong, you do need someone to enhance your life because you aren't exactly happy with it the way things are now. You should know this dude pretty good as he is an old friend from HS, what type of a guy was he then? I don't recommend anybody that drinks alcohol, alcohol can turn a good guy into a monster when he gets too much of it. 

  • 10 months ago

    finish college before getting into a relationship

  • Kaylee
    Lv 6
    10 months ago

    So what is exactly stopping you? I have been hurt in the past by exes and I was scared to date but the moment I met my boyfriend I knew we were going to end up dating. Is there something about him that suggests he may hurt you? I feel like when you are about to date someone you should definitely be honest with the pros and cons and make sure the person is worth your time. Remember no one is perfect. Relationships aren’t about enhancing your life, but complimenting your life. So make sure your personalities and lifestyles fit 

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