Does slapping on the arm/shoulder count as hitting?
My bf s untrained/hyper dog was jumping on me and hurting me, so I pushed it off. My bf immediately smacked me on the arm/shoulder. It didn t knock me over but it hurt. Later when I was still upset he apologized and said he didn t mean to do it, it was just a reflex, then asked me to forgive him.
I told him I forgive him but if he ever lays a hand on me like that again I m gone.
I guess my question is, does that count as him hitting me? Should I run from this relationship? Will it get worse? (First time he s done this in two years) Am I overreacting?!
- Suzy QLv 78 months ago
Of course that is hitting you. And it worries me that you need to ask this. It makes me wonder if increasingly abusive behaviour is happening in your relationship, making it harder to see what is normal and what isn't.
About the reflex excuse: let's take a closer look at that, shall we? You did something he didn't like, and his REFLEX was to hit you. It was automatic, he didn't even have to think about it. That sounds wired pretty deeply into his personality, doesn't it? The response to immediately hit someone when he doesn't like what they're doing?
Today he didn't like you pushing away his dog while the animal was hurting you. What will he not like you doing tomorrow?
- AnaLv 68 months ago
People who defend their stupid mangy mutts over people bother the crap out of me, so I’m probably biased here.
Dog lovers will probably be like “Omgerd you monster! How could you push an innocent little doggo! He should’ve done more than that! He was just defending his pup!” Yada yada. Well, screw em.
IMO I agree with what you did and I disagree with what he did. He needs to learn to train his damn dog to not jump on people, period. And you have the right to push it off you, especially if he’s cutting you with nails or getting you dirty.
However with that said, I don’t think you should dump him over it THIS TIME.
But I do think that you need to talk to him about this, and explain WHY he was wrong AND what he should’ve done instead. (He should have taught his dog to not jump on people in an undisciplined and wild manner, AND he should have understood why you didn’t feel comfortable with a dog jumping on him like that and scratching you. He should have backed you up.)
- Ross JamesLv 78 months ago
If he did it once, he WILL do it again. Just a matter of time. RED FLAG! Get away. Don't listen to apologies. Don't listen to promises. If there was one "reflex", there will be another.
- StanleyLv 68 months ago
Its kind of weird how some people love their animals more than humans. I would be cautious because if he reacts like that over you pushing his dog away he may react like this again but even worse when a real conflict comes up.
- What do you think of the answers? You can sign in to give your opinion on the answer.
- 8 months ago
No clue what that means but I don't know