Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsFamily · 9 months ago

How do I explain my feelings to my controlling parent?

Hi let me give you a little back story my grandparents raised me in a Jehovahs Witness household my grandfather died years ago and now it’s just my controlling grandma taking care of me I’m currently 17 I have never wanted to be a witness and I started dating my boyfriend when I was 16 I never told my grandma about it until now when my psycho sister kept blackmailing me about it and now my grandma keeps saying I’m a liar and I told her I never wanted to lie I only did it because I was scared she would kick me out because she kick it my mom and my aunt and I told her she has always been abusive and was traumatizing especially about the religion and her main argument is I lied because I wanted too but I wanted to tell the truth and she said I’m not allowed to make decisions for myself until I’m 18 and basically she completely controls my life until I’m 18 but I told her she can’t live my life for me and she can’t make my life decisions and like why can’t she be happy for me she treats me like property and I hate it but she doesn’t understand every time I try to explain to her I don’t know if I’m wording it wrong or something sorry if this makes no sense

4 Answers

  • 9 months ago

    i wouldnt bother if theyre going to control you

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  • Foofa
    Lv 7
    9 months ago

    Try this: "I understand that you have the legal obligation to raise me until I turn 18, but the transition from child to adult isn't a switch that happens overnight. I know I'm still a minor but I also know that if I don't experience enough of the world at 17 I'm not going to know how to deal with it when I turn 18. So I'm asking you to ease up on me just a little so that I don't enter adulthood so naive that I'll be easily taken advantage of."

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  • Anonymous
    9 months ago

    Don't worry, the cult is on it's last legs and when you're 18, you can get away from all of that abuse.

    • Lv 4
      9 months agoReport

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  • Blearg
    Lv 5
    9 months ago

    I'm sorry that you're going through that. I have a friend who was raised Jehovah's Witness and left. He also dated a non-JW as a teen, and it was partly due to his JW families intolerance and aggression in response that he decided to leave, despite the threat of being shunned. Now, he and his father are both outside of the religion, but his mother and sisters are still in it. It sucks, and sometimes he still tries to see if he can get through to talk to his siblings again, but his mom always blocks him from doing so. Despite this, he has a great relationship with his dad, and is constantly connecting with all sorts of different people, seeking his own truth and being kind in the ways he feels truly make sense. It's clear that having to break away from family like that was hard, but for him it was worth it.

    I can't tell you what might be right for you, but I do want you to know that beyond those next few years, however trapped you may feel now, something better might be waiting.

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