Pit asked in PetsDogs · 6 months ago

Separation anxiety dilemma, take dog back to the shelter or can this be cured?

First, I would not abandoned a dog ever.

But the shelter (they do not kill the animals, they treat them great) that we are evaluating the adoption has a two week testing to see if the dog is compatible with us and our lifestyle, and we are in that two week period.

My partner wakes up very early, 5:00 am, and I'm on a business travel. Our neighbor wrote us a letter telling us that the dog stars to howl and can be really loud when we are not at home, not letting our neighbor sleep.

The previous owner surrender the dog because cannot afford him, and I think that, and living in a cruel shelter before being rescued by the great shelter that doesn't kill animals, created this separation anxiety in the dog.

I love the dog, so much, and I don't care to spend money and time to fix this, but what happens if we train him and it does not work? What happen if the separation anxiety does not get cured?

Should I take the dog back to the shelter (it's a shelter that they do not kill them, they treat them greatly, not in cage or anything), and wait to another person (like a retired person that can spend the whole day with him) to adopt him?

Should I give it a try?

Please, help me. I do not want to be selfish, I want the best for the dog, and I'm between a decision that my heart tells me to keep him, but my mind tells me to let the dog be adopted by a retired person or a person that can expend 24/7 with him...

:(

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  • 6 months ago
    Favorite Answer

    NO please dont return the dog!!! I had the exact same problem a few years ago.. I rescued a Bull mastiff cross and when I brought her home she was an absolute NIGHTMARE! She was anxious and petrified of people! She was afraid of everything! She was super clingy to me! Everytime I left the room she would start doing high pitched screaming noises and get her self into a very distressed state leaping up at the doors and windows it was awful you could hear her half way down the street. Everytime I had to leave the house to go to the shop and things she would go hysterical and she would rip my wallpaper and chew and pull things off my sides and make a mess of anything she could get her paws on.....She hated men and she lashed out an bit my sister one day on the hand, My parents were afraid of her and would not come into my home. I did not know how things would ever work! I started researching on Google dogs with seperation anxitey and I discovered that by taking simple steps you can actually cure this behaviour... The way I did it was.

    1) NO FUSSING THE ERATIC BEHAVIOUR

    2)NO PRAISING WHEN THE DOG SCREAMS CRIES OR HOWLS FOR ATTENTION

    3)START LITTLE....

    LEAVE THE HOUSE FOR 2 MINUTES THEN RE ENTER..

    LEAVE AGAIN FOR 5 MINUTES THEN RE ENTER

    LEAVE AGAIN FOR !) MINUTES THEN RE ENTER

    you need to spend some time doing this throughout the day. This activity gets the dog use to the feel that you ARE always comming back. It can take time but if you keep practicing this trick each time building up the time.

    You can also leave Tasty treats for distractions EG Big Juicy Dog bones or Conga Toys filled with treats and paste.

    You can also leave a top or an item of clothing with the dog that has your scent on it which may help.

    If you are serious about traning you need to be consistent with all I have said above. Seriously if you dont ahve the time to put into do this then you rrally shouldnt be owning a dog if your partner is up an out at 5am and your away on business truthfully your lives dont sound as if they are suited to owning a dog (forgive me if I am wrong)| If you realise u dont have the time then you need to give the dog back...but know that that will contribute more to the seperation anxierty.

    Aprox Around 6-8 weeks it took my dog to grasp the idea that I was always comming back.

    10 years on and we lost her to a tumour but she was the most loving loyal cherished part of our family and I could have not imagined life with out her....

    • ?6 months agoReport

      Thank you Grace. You are awesome. You just gave me hope. I’m actually working as a Remote Developer right now, so I spend a lot of time in home (for now), so I can train him. I really want to help the dog, he is the sweetest dog I’ve ever met. Thank you so much! A ray of light! 🤗

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  • 6 months ago

    I think you need a professional trailer to give you insight. Cesar always said its the person, not the dog.

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  • 6 months ago

    Another throw away dog? Every adopted dog comes with a ton of baggage from what his life was like before you. Being too eager to get rid of the dog tells me that you probably couldn't train it right any way. Abused dogs have lots of problems & you have to be willing to do what you can to help the dog adjust to its new life. For about 50 + yrs I have rescued large & extra large dogs & every one of them came with baggage, so I have had to work through many problems for each one. It is not easy & it tries your patience to the point you want to scream.

    Get online & using google look for anything about separation anxiety.

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  • Ocimom
    Lv 7
    6 months ago

    I would return the dog. Unless you are at home more to train the dog, you should not have this dog. Separation anxiety can take months to overcome.

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  • Anonymous
    6 months ago

    It's getting to the point where the only people who can keep dogs are self-employed or welfare recipients.

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    • ?6 months agoReport

      I just wanted to know about other people experience with dog anxiety and if I could work with it or if it was better for the dog to be with a retired person.

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  • 6 months ago

    What the hell were you thinking of getting a dog when you are not able to care for it? Care means feeding, training, exercising and BEING WITH THE THING. You sound stupid, to be honest,and I am amazed the shelter let you have a dog Take it back, and grow up.

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    • ?6 months agoReport

      Did you even read the details? I said that I HAVE the money and I’m able to help the dog. A business trip doesn’t last forever people... It just 4 days and I work as a remote developer from MY HOME. So stop assuming things. I have the money, the commitment to help him.

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  • 6 months ago

    My first thought about this is why, oh why, don't Shelters do more research when rehoming their dogs. This would avoid your situation because for starters, right now doesn't seem to be the right time for you to have a dog, with both of you working, and you away on business at that.

    You can't train a dog not to miss you - dogs are social animals and have an inbuilt need to be part of a pack, even if nobody can be expected to be there 24/7

    2 weeks is NOT long enough to decide whether the dog is in the right home, with the right people in my opinion and if he's making a racket, upsetting neighbours, clearly you are on a hiding to nothing to expect this rehoming to work. At the moment, whatever happened in the dog's previous life is still with him and may always be there to some degree. Think of his feelings - coming away from his previous home, into kennels, and out again, with people who are NOT THERE.

    You are right, the dog needs to go back and hopefully rehomed with people who are more likely to BE there.

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    • ?6 months agoReport

      And people are actually there. My partner wakes up a 5:00 AM, then go back home around 2:30 PM, and I work from home most of the time since I'm a remote developer (I'll not be working always as a remote, but for the next months I'll expend a lot of time at home. The business trip is a short one).

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  • 6 months ago

    Put a collar on the dog that gives it a gentle vibration which will stop it from howling, barking. You could also look into a doggy day care that you could leave your dog at least a couple times a week. Then cut it back to just once a week.

    It's VERY normal for a dog that has been abandoned in the past to think that you are never coming back. Work with the dog by leaving the home, hanging out outside and if you hear it start barking or howling go back in the house and say "NO!" Repeat until you can walk outside and hide around the corner and the dog doesn't react. Go back and reward the dog.

    You could do things like leaving a TV on while you're gone or music playing.

    • ?6 months agoReport

      Nice advice with the daycare and the other tips! thank you so much!

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  • Robert
    Lv 6
    6 months ago

    The noise issue can be cured with vocal cord surgery. The dog doesn't know the difference after the surgery. He still thinks he is barking or howling.

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    • ?6 months agoReport

      People, the dog is not alone all day.My partner wakes up at 5:00 am, but he's back at 2:30-3:00 PM, and my business trip is for a few days... Why everyone is assuming that the dog's left alone all day... He'll be alone, if any, for a few hours... And also I work as a remote developer from my home...

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  • 6 months ago

    Better take the dog back. It takes time and patience to fix separation anxiiety. Medication might help, but that runs into money, and it still takes time. When you take the dog back, be completely honest about the separation anxiety. If the next adopter knows that it's a problem they can decide if it's something they can deal with or not.

    • ?6 months agoReport

      Thank you Karen for an honest and respectful answer :)

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