Why do I have to be my best self in order to be in a relationship?

To me, having to look my best for someone to love me is really superficial. Having to be confident & happy & personally fulfilled for someone to love me is unrealistic. I m not always going to be happy & perfect. To me, if I have to be that way in order for you to love me, then you re not for me. What are you going to do in the tough times of life? Leave me because I m not happy? No thanks. But all of these articles tell you that you have to be your best self in order to be in a relationship. Maybe it s just something that they put out there as a "don t think about yourself being rejected, just focus on yourself" kind of thing. I don t know, but I don t get it & I don t like it.

2 Answers

  • Jr
    Lv 5
    6 months ago

    Well you’re right about one thing, you really don’t get this at all. Being happy and looking your best isn’t something you do for your partner, it’s something you do for yourself. If you don’t love yourself, then how do you expect someone else to love you?

    Being in a relationship isn’t about being perfect and being happy all the time, that’s not how relationships work. One can argue that the tough times are what strengthen a relationship. A relationship is about being there for your partner through both good times and bad times.

    If you’re not happy or confident by yourself, being in a relationship isn’t going to change that. A relationship isn’t going to make you happy. A relationship is more about two people sharing their happiness together, not the other way around. You got a long way to go buddy.

    Good luck

    • ...Show all comments
    • Amanda6 months agoReport

      life, but that's because no one cares & it's sad being the only one that does & they're not helping by tossing me aside for dumb reasons either.

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  • 6 months ago

    It's called unconditional love and it's what all the hype is about. If you don't have that then what you have is fake ****. I am not saying that it doesn't feel good or that it isn't worth spending time on. I'm just saying that once you find that, everything else combined will be meaningless. True ****.

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