Should you kick a rebellious 18 year old out?
My 17 year old son is very rebellious. He doesn't listen to us, smokes, drinks, always stays out hours past his curfew, refuses to do chores, and rarely puts any effort towards his schoolwork. He is turning 18 in November and if he doesn't change by then, we are probably going to kick him out.
- 6 months ago
No. Sit him down and say if he hasn't changed his behaviour in 4 months you will have no choice but to throw him out. Give him love, support and praise as well as discipline because there are probably mental health/life issues that are causing his behaviour. If you do ever have to through him out always be there for him. It's what a good parent is supposed to do x
- 6 months ago
I would advise to sit him down and firmly speak to him about his bad behaviour. Explain why you are cross and if he doesn’t start listening to your requests and taking an interest in his school work then you will ground him until he does. You don’t have to kick him out, just get stricter.
- Ranchmom1Lv 76 months ago
Depending on your state, you might have to support him until he graduates high school.
If this is not the case with you, what I would do now is sit down with him at a time when you are calm and read a prepared statement to him (less emotional, and you can think ahead of time about what you want to say) outlining exactly what will happen when he turns 18, so he can make preparations.
- Anonymous6 months ago
Sure, you have this option, but what went wrong in his upbringing to make him this way? Clearly, he doesn't respect you or your rules. I learned the hard way at age 7 who my bosses were. And I grew up in a fun, happy, well run home.
Assuming you're female, when you say we, is his biodad the other part of this? A stepdad? A boyfriend? If it's his dad, what does he say? If not, have you made some bad choices along the way? If you're a male, these same questions apply.
Anyway, this isn't about pointing fingers, but about being a good parent and what is fair to him. It's pretty much impossible to turn a 17 year old into a respectful young man, but you at least need to try. Have a calm convo with him where you explain what needs to change if he wants to stay with you after age 18. Be very specific about rules and what you expect. If he's entering his senior year, require a certain GPA. Once he turns 18, he needs a part time job and you get some of the earnings, etc etc. In exchange, he gets a roof over his head and your support as he looks past hs into furthering his education. (I don't mean financial, I mean emotional support).
- What do you think of the answers? You can sign in to give your opinion on the answer.
- edwardLv 76 months ago
Do it, i dare you. It was so hard on my parents when i moved out. It’s harder than you think to kick your kids out
- TomalochkLv 66 months ago
You probably have a nice basement .... Could you let her live there ?... She could do odd-jobs to help pay her way until she eventually meets a guy !
- linkus86Lv 76 months ago
Not necessarily. The fact that he does all these things only proves you have failed his as his parent to learn to become a respectful and responsible person. You could take more time to teach these lessons instead.
That being said, if your mind is made up to do so, its in both his and your best interest to warn him about the consequences to his actions so he can either redeem himself in your eyes or prepare to be on his own. It would be plain old mean to surprise this on him on his birthday.
- ArimatthewdaviesLv 76 months ago
that's typically what a teenager does they do their own thing and you have to send them down the road that's nothing abnormal it happens every day. just politely let the person know that if he wants to continue to have free place to stay. He's got to obey the rules but if he is not going to obey the rules his 18th birthday is his last day in your house. Have that sent to him by certified mail. So that he will know that you serious.
- NancyLv 66 months ago
You can't if he's between 18 and 19 and still in high school. Also, in some states, the age of majority is 19, like Nebraska, so you wouldn't be able to kick him out there, either.
- Anonymous6 months ago
Whatever floats your ⛵ .