Am I being too strict?
Am I being too strict?
So my daughter is failing all her classes at school, being a teacher myself I am constantly pushing her to achieve. She does 2 and a half hours studying a night, in which I will ask her to go to the study room. Where her phone and any other distractions will be removed. She has recently started to rebel this rule and has snuck out on several occasions. So I have decided to confiscate her phone, laptop and any other electronic device and ground her from meeting friends or going out for he hours without me until her grades get better and she makes more effort with her learning. She thinks I’m totally out of order, however I care she has a good education and I want her to understand misbehaving doesn’t do you any good.
- Anonymous1 year agoFavourite answer
Of course its not too hard - dont listen to other people on here who probably *****-foot around their children who get away with murder. My parents were strict and it did me no harm as it didnt when you were a child. she needs boundaries and rules to get better grades you have done what you need to do in order for her to use this time to do whats best its up to her to do it - not swan off with friends which she has her whole life to do when she is older and making a living and hopefully will teach her children the same principle. Its not like you are locking her away - its for her own good and if she is failing its because she isn't trying hard enough and her teachers will tell you if she is trying but just not gaining the grades - so no need to indulge her by going to doctors - its just plain old kid stuff not wanting to study and just play out and do what they want to do as usual
- Anonymous1 year ago
If your daughter is failing her classes, then perhaps she has a problem, either physical or psychological, that needs to be addressed. When was the last time your daughter saw her doctor, or had her vision and hearing checked? Has she ever been evaluated for intellectual disabilities, or possibly for Autism? Is she getting bullied in school? Are there other issues going on, such as a personality conflict with a teacher or school officials? You need to find the answers to these questions, because there may be a good reason why things aren't going right.
One thing I would do is tone down the nagging about grades. Nobody, and I don't give a rat's behind who they are, appreciates being nagged constantly about something that is giving them problems. Nagging is like fat shaming someone who is over weight. Most of the time, the person is WELL AWARE that they have a problem, and they DON'T NEED to be constantly reminded of it, often by people who are totally IGNORANT about the circumstances of the situation. There are any number of reasons why your daughter could be unable to do her schoolwork, and not all of them are under her( or your) control. What you need to do is make more of an effort to learn what is really behind your daughter's situation, not make it worse by constantly nagging at her.
I get that you want your daughter to have a good education, and that education is important to you. My parents felt the same way when I was young. But you're not going to improve things by being constantly on her case, especially when you won't do anything to help her besides complain that she's not working hard enough. Maybe the reason she isn't doing her work is because she feels that she can't.
- kavanaLv 41 year ago
No you are doing fine.maybe take her for a ride and show her all the homeless ppl around and how they live.Tell her thats the alternative if dont listen too you.Abit dramatic but you get my point.
- - Mé -Lv 71 year ago
More info needed: What are 'good' grades for you ? Some parents push their kids to have high grades just for the sake of being able to say "look, my kid has high grades". Not every kid is a gifted one, actually most are average and have average grades, nothing wrong with that, as a teacher you should know.
You say your daughter is failing all her classes at school. That's not normal. What has changed since that started to happen? Does she have a learning disability? Does she have a good sight? Does she sleep enough? eats enough? Have you checked all that?
I don't see how sending her 2.5 hours to the study room is going to make her suddenly a better student. You are a teacher, you know everyone learns in different ways. Learn what are your kid's ways to learn and help her.
She's rebeling bc you are being strict and not really helpful.
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- Jackie MLv 71 year ago
As a mum and grandma I don't think you are being too strict and from past experience she is rebelling because she is struggling with the work and needs help so spend time with her and find out what her capability level is, Good Luck
- 1 year ago
In my perspective, that's too much. But then again, people are not the same. In my case, I failed several classes of mine in the past, but none of my parents punished me for it nor raised their voice at me. They were understanding even though it was clear that they were disappointed in me. It gave me a sense of peace and I did my best even more which led me to passing them eventually. If they did to me what you did to your child, I would've lost motivation, determination and I would rebel as well. That's just my opinion though.
- naughtydogg70Lv 71 year ago
First, I don't believe you. Second, as a teacher, why aren't you helping her study? Your plan is to send her off to do it herself?
- Beverly SLv 71 year ago
I'd say failing all her classes requires action & you are doing the right thing.
- The TaxpayerLv 71 year ago
You're doing fine.
- 1 year ago
Maybe it's not that she doesn't want to do the homework but she doesn't know how to do the homework. Possibly doing it with her might figure out if she just doesn't care or really can't do it.