This guy is showing some serious red flags here!
1) He insisted you come back to your place on the 1st date- I can get it somewhat, he had a good time and wanted to continue things. It's fine to ask, but he took it too far by pressuring you to come to his house, at least that's the vibe I got when you said "it was hard to say no". If that's what happened, it shows he lacks boundaries, if he respected you, he would be cool with you not wanting to continue the date by going inside.
2) After the 1st date, he's pushing for more and more! Ok its fine to ask for a 2nd date if the first one was a success, but to dictate when the next 2 are is not only assumptious, but also very pushy, and again it shows he doesn't understand boundaries. A normal person would ask for a 2nd date, they wouldn't say "were hanging out tommorow and monday", its as if he's telling you to fall into line, again, not acceptable behaviour.
3) The special ring tone is way over the top! It is not normal to put a ring tone for someone after ONE date, I have never heard of anyone doing that (guy or girl), it seems not only insecure, but also displays not just possessive behaviour, but obsessive as well.
This guy is displaying controlling, obsessive and needy behaviour... all of this after one meet up! It concerns me how much worse he will get if you guys do dive into a relationship, I'm concerned he will cause not just emotional harm, but physical as well!
I have experiences with these types of people, my Dad was like that, my mom's boyfriend later on in life was like that with her, my ex was like that with me during our relationship! I think its safe to say I have experience in this area when it comes to this type of borderline psychotic behaviour.
I think you really need to walk away from this guy, don't worry about hurting his feelings, you just need to rip the bandaid off, end things, because if you don't the outcome wont' end well for you.