My boyfriend won’t be intimate with me, and I don’t know how to fix it.?

I don’t mean just sexually, although that is a major part of it (if I never initiated, we’d probably have sex less than every other month). I mean, he’s gotten super non-affectionate or romantic, and I feel more like I’m just a friend of his who he happens to sleep in the same bed with. I understand that he hurts constantly, and is tired from work (he is a technician), but I just want HIM to cuddle with ME sometimes. Or to hold MY hand. I’m always the one who has to ask to cuddle, or take his hand.

I know it sounds like he is just not interested in me anymore, but I am sure it’s not that. And I’ve brought up a conversation about it a few different times, but he always just ends up convinced he’s a jerk and doesn’t oay attention to my needs, even though that’s all he tries to do constantly. He always makes me choose whatever I want to do, and he tried to do what he thinks will make me happy.

But anyways, how to I try to fix this? Or at least, how can I try communicating with him in a way that he doesn’t feel bad? (Even though that’s all I try to do. Each time I’ve brought it up I’ve tried phrasing things differently, etc, so he recieves it better, but he always ends up thinking he’s the a**hole.)

30 Answers

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  • 1 year ago

    he is gay or banging someone

  • 1 year ago

    He is most likely cheating on you with someelse or he he just can get it up any more

  • 1 year ago

    If he has legitimate reasons for not being intimate right now, but was in the past, you have a couple of options. If this is y'alls only issue then you can just be patient, take care of things yourself, or have a fling. How old are you? What part of the country/world do you live in. Give him some room and see what happens.

  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    training for you-that's what your life will be when you're married-jump ahead 20 or more years

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  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    Get new boyfriends.

  • Alan H
    Lv 7
    1 year ago

    You hardly seem compatible. Move on.

  • Anonymous
    1 year ago

    Leave him

  • 1 year ago

    I had the same problem with my EX. This was the reason we broke up after 4 years. The problem is that your BF is used to you, he is used to not do anything. You are the active one in the relationship why does he have to do anything. It can get very frustrating to the point that you could even get severely depressed because you think you are unattractive or he doesn't love you anymore. The sad truth is that nothing will change no matter how much talk about it... In the end, you need to be happy and this person can't give you what you deserve. You are both miserable and feeling terrible. Try separating for a while and see if something will change when he sees that he can lose you.

  • 1 year ago

    There's got to be reasons behind this. Maybe stress from work or something, but you need to try to get him to respond and talk it out.

  • 1 year ago

    You can't fix him, and never will be able to. IF he wants to change things up, he will. If not, he won't. Personally, i think he's not that into the relationship anymore. Sex once every two months? That's not even near to normal.

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