How do I avoid being sad about losses in the family on Christmas this year (last two years have been bad)?

My grandmother died in 2014. We had Christmas that year and it was civil. Then the feuding started and now most her kids are distant and there is no Christmas celebration. It is my Mom's family and my Dad left when I was a baby so my Mom is all I have and her family. My Mom is the neutral party in the feuding... show more My grandmother died in 2014. We had Christmas that year and it was civil. Then the feuding started and now most her kids are distant and there is no Christmas celebration. It is my Mom's family and my Dad left when I was a baby so my Mom is all I have and her family. My Mom is the neutral party in the feuding but everyone resents her cause she is not taking their side. She says this will pass.

I feel so sad with it not being a family Christmas. Cousins and extended family were the joy I had in Christmas. We tried to set something up the last two years and very few people came and it led to other conflicts. This year will be the year I see no one but my Mom.

I am going to act cheery on December 25th and do good deeds at a soup kitchen and all that but how do I get over feeling so sad that I don't have the family connection I had for so long? Christmas is a time of loss I feel and I am sad it is coming. I am well into adulthood (31) but feel so sad.
Update: Marking anonymous to discuss family gossip
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