Ready or not... What if potty training just needs to happen now?

I'll try to keep this short. My son turns 4 in 4 months. That's when he ages out of his special treatment group for toddlers with a serious speech delay. Then he will go to a special school. They don't change diapers, and it's too far away for me to just do it myself.

So he needs to potty train. Now. And he doesn't want to.

He has shown bladder and bowel control, both holding and releasing. He is not autistic and shows average intelligence, understanding of language and emotional development. He just can't form words properly. And goes in full tantrum mode at the suggestion of wearing underwear.

I can't wait until he feels good and well ready, and I won't hold a screaming toddler down on the toilet. So how do I do this?

3 Answers

  • Ista
    Lv 7
    3 years ago

    For my own son, I made it a big deal. Congratulations! You're a big boy! I'm so proud of you!!! Big boys don't wear diapers, those are for babies. Big boys get to wear underwear! Yay Team!!! Big boys get to use the potty. So on and so forth, and I put him in his underwear, wished him luck, and sent him to go play.

    I never held him on the potty, against his will or otherwise. I found that idea cruel, and knew my boy wouldn't go for it. Besides, after he wet his pants the first time, he had no qualms about sitting on the potty to try to avoid that problem again.

    I praised lavishly for the successes, sympathized for the misses, and kept it positive.

    He was 2, with a speech delay, and had no problem processing that wet feeling running down his leg, when he wet his pants 2 hours later. I sympathized with him, cleaned him up, reminded him to use the potty, and wished him better luck next time.

    We started on a Friday because I'd ran out of diapers, and was too tired to run back to town. He had the general concept by Monday morning, had it mastered in two weeks.

    In your case, if he doesn't go for the "Hurray!" approach, I'd hide/throw out the diapers and tell him you ran out and that all that's left are underwear, thank goodness he's a Big Boy and can wear them. And don't look back.

    Good luck! You can do this! ;)

  • LizB
    Lv 7
    3 years ago

    Do the hard switch to undies and expect a rough couple of weeks with plenty of accidents. That's eventually what we had to do. It was stressful, many tantrums were involved (and my kiddo has not particularly tantrum-prone), but he went from 0% trained to fully trained #1 and #2 within a few weeks. Once he figured it out I think he felt pretty empowered by being able to take care of his own needs, and my sweet little well-behaved guy came back.

  • Tulip
    Lv 7
    3 years ago

    If he has been receiving special needs care ask them

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