Anonymous asked in Social ScienceGender Studies · 7 years ago

Why do some men still have very chavinistic attitudes toward women?

I just broke up with this guy after a couple of months. he is in his early thirties and seemed nice at first but then he started making these crazy statements. he said that he didn't think it was wrong for a man to rape a woman if they were married. he said that even though his parents were married for forty years it is not his moms money it it his fathers because she never worked outside the home. he also thought that being a mom instead of working outside the home was not real work. this was weird because i never met such a young guy with such chavinistic views? why?

10 Answers

  • 7 years ago
    Best answer

    Most people inherit attitudes like this from there parents. If his father was vocal about opinions such as this while he was growing up he will have learnt them well. I am in my 30s and I know many men and women much younger than me who have similar attitudes. It can be very hard to unlearn something like this even if he wanted to change, it will ingrained deep into his personality.

  • 7 years ago

    Ask yourself this question: Name one obligation that women have towards men that is enforced by law or social custom and she cannot get out of on a whim?

    The answer is that there are no such obligations. However, men have many obligations that are both enforced by laws and social customs.

    Now is it chauvinistic for a man to think he has a right to have sex with his wife? No. If a man agrees to have sex with only one person for the rest of his life, to financially support her, protect her life with his own, don't you think she should be expected to have sex with him? What's the point in being monogamous but not having any sex?

    If you feel that you have no obligation to have sex with your husband then why marry at all?

    And guess what, housework is not real work. When monetized it is one of the lowest paid professions.

    Tell me what the difference is between a woman who lives alone and works and a woman who is married and doesn't work? The married woman works about 40 hours less a week but probably has a better standard of living. Housecleaning is something that everyone does. It requires no special training or skills. To declare that housework is real work is like declaring that taking a bath or brushing your teeth is real work. Hygiene in the home is expected.

    Now does this mean that after spending years cleaning house entitles you to half of what your husband makes? The law says yes but the law is sexist and biased against men. You've already spent years being financially supported, you've had your room, board, clothing, healthcare, taken care of as well as gifts and vacations and use of a car. The cost of these things far exceed the value of your house cleaning.

    So why should you get half of what is left over when you decide you wan to abandon your family? The answer is you shouldn't but because women have demanded the law privilege them in this matter you can leave and take as much as you can get.

    For the record, if I ever marry you can guarantee she's going to work and pay half for EVERYTHING. I'll do half the housecleaning. It's not hard and frankly I like the feeling of autonomy over those little things. This way if we ever hit a rough patch she's not going to be able to cash out. She'll get half which is what she paid for. My personal savings and investments will be mine and she will never be able to touch them.

    Oh yea, and most importantly, I plan on doing half the child care. Even if I have to work part time. No woman will come into court and say I'm not active enough and therefore I should be denied access to my kids and made to pay her money for decades. When she divorces, we share custody and she pays her own way.

    I'm no woman's property. Going 50/50 is the only way you can ensure a woman has an obligation towards you.

  • 7 years ago

    NO WOMAN HAS A RIGHT TO ACCUSE MEN OF BEING CHAUVINSTS! for christ sake look around we have female only gyms,hospital,clubs,jobs and so on. Look how many false claims from psudo scientists that claim women are better at this and that get posted in the national newspaper while they wont even post a story about a man getting an award! women have a female chauvinst group inttrenched in all major colleges called feminism. WHEN THE SEXISM AND THE FEMALE CHAUVINISM ENDS AGAINST MEN IT WILL END AGAINST WOMEN TOO.

  • While he should respect her for the work she does and the role nature gave her, always uplift his pride (but demand respect from him). Pride is what will make a man get up everyday to provide for his family.

    In the past the marriage was a woman's consent to have sex with the man, but family law made clear distinctions based on sex and every state had laws requiring that a man support his wife, children and provide them with a home to live in. But, the way our laws are today I do not believe a man has any right to his wife's body if she says no because he has no legal obligation to support her for the rest of his life.

    When a man is secure in his masculinity, he will not see himself fit for the female role but he will respect women and take responsibility for his children and the woman that bears them. When a man is not secure in his masculinity he will take no responsibility for his family, he will use, abuse and exploit women. A man secure in his masculinity will not take support from a woman but he will respect women and take personal responsibility to see to it that his family (including the mother of his children) is provided for.

    If a man starts talking about equality, he is not the kind any woman should want to be with because this means he doesn't value her for the role biology gave her and instead thinks she should be doing her share by joining him in the workforce so he doesn't have to do all the work supporting the family.

    "Our Judeo-Christian civilization has developed the law and custom that, since women bear the physical consequences of the sex act, men must be required to pay in other ways. These laws and customs decree that a man must carry his share by physical protection and financial support of his children and of the woman that bears his children, and also by a code of behavior that benefits and protects both the woman and the children.

    This is accomplished by the institution of the family. Our respect for the family as the basic unit of society, which is ingrained in the laws and customs of our Judeo-Christian civilization, is the greatest single achievement in the history of women's rights. It assures a woman the most precious and important right of all- the right to keep her own baby and to be supported and protected in the enjoyment of watching her baby grow and develop." - Phyllis Schlafly, 1972

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  • 7 years ago

    That's not chauvinism, that's bigotry.

    I don't know why anyone would say things like that. Now don't get me wrong, I abhor feminism and feminists more than anything, but those are very strange things to say, BUT everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I say that oppressive censorship is far worse that unorthodox, bigoted views, hands down.

  • 7 years ago

    Oh I am so tired.

    You dated a stupid man, you can't assume all men have this attitude.

    I am a woman, and even I am sick of women blaming all men on ones mistake. Not assuming you are.

  • Anonymous
    7 years ago

    Cathy do you realize that there is nothing, in existence, as evil and self-serving as a woman, don't you? Woman is the closest thing we have to Satan itself in this world.

  • 7 years ago

    Because women can't spell. Its Chauvinist, and you should probably go make him a sandwich now.

  • Anonymous
    7 years ago

    get back to kitchen and make me a sammich

  • Possibly the way he was raised by his parents. His parents, especially his father, may have instilled those mysogynistic characteristics in him since they were from a different generation. In a similar fashion, my stepfather, who is otherwise te nicest guy, is somewhat racist towards black people because his father raised him that way.

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