What would you think If you were in this kind of relationship?

I have been seeing this guy for about 4 months now, our relationship is just a friends with benefits. Now let me give you some background. I dated him about 15 years ago and dumped him because I had heard that he was planning on asking me to marry him and at 15 I was just not ready to face that type of conversation so I lied to him and told him we were over and was seeing someone else.( I know I was wrong but I was only 15 at the time) So anyways 15 years later We meet up with each other, online of all places and started talking again. So anyways one thing lead to another and we both agreed that we neither of us wanted a commitment. Well now He is doing several things that is starting to make me think he has changed his mind. For one he always asks if I am getting attached, and no matter how many times or different ways I have told him no, I am not looking for anything more than what we have he still continues to ask. Almost like he is hoping for a different answer.

He also makes sure that we do not leave each other without a kiss and a hug, which was never a thing in the beginning. He has also mentioned wanting to go out of town together for the weekend. Which to me is something a couple does not F*ck buddies.

When I asked him if he was getting attached He response was I dont get attached anymore, I have learn my lesson. I am very confused cause though he says one thing I dont get the same from his body language and gestures.

What would you think?


COLDHARD -Ok, First of all I am not leading him on, or toying with his heart. I have been fully honest and upfront. I didnt lure him in with promises or lies He knew from jump that I wasnt looking for a relationship so I am not toying with his heart.or looking to break it. Nor am I trying to keep him, he can leave whenever wanted, it is his choice to stay and his choice that he accepted the type of relationship i wanted and which he made me feel he wanted as well.

Update 2:

BELLADON- You know why dont you STFU, Who in the hell is whining, All I wanted was to see if I was truely reading more into things than what I should be. And as far as your comment you dont know what he sees in me anyways, was a little bit uncalled for because believe it or not I am a nice person and care for this man, And I want to stop our relationship if he is truely feeling the way I believe before I break his heart. Cause I still would like our friendship to continue.

7 Answers

  • 1 decade ago
    Favourite answer

    hmm wow pretty interesting! especially that he wanted to marry you at 15. =D could not have seriously thought things out then. And now that you guys are "seeing" but not seeing each other again it's probably bringing up some of those memories. He sounds pretty attached to me and having a relationship in which it is only physical can be fun but it never ends well... He definitly seems to want more while you don't. He is only saying that he isn't attached because that is what you told him. He doesn' want to upset you because he actually likes you and wants you in his life even if its not the way he really wants you in his life. Just ask yourself if you truely do not want a relationship with him and why. You can't be F*ck buddies forever. F.B.F.E. =D

  • kitten
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    My first response is... you're 30. What are you doing with a f*** buddy? Grow up. Yes, obviously you didn't want to marry him when you were 15... thats kind of creepy. But now, 15 years later you feel the need to mess with his heart again? Obviously he is not the f*** buddy type. And you are too old to be acting so immature. He wants a relationship, like any normal person that age would. You know, something thats actually GOING somewhere. So either be with him, or move on and let him get on with his life.

  • 1 decade ago

    It sounds to me like he is attached. If you aren't then you should make sure he knows that and you aren't leading him on at all. For some men a kiss goodbye can lead them on. If you aren't comfortable in the relationship step back and think about things. Follow your heart, not the sex.

  • Kaden
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    Well in my point of view, friends with benefits is all i ever had and i want to keep it that way.

    Women like you give me a good reason to live life to the fullest.

  • What do you think of the answers? You can sign in to give your opinion on the answer.
  • 1 decade ago

    that's why you don't have these kind of relationships. someone always gets attached and hurt. I would end it.

  • 1 decade ago

    Basically actions speak louder than words... and his actions are clearer than his words

  • 1 decade ago

    either stfu and move on or just take it and quit whining jeez. i dont know what this guy sees in you anyway

Still have questions? Get answers by asking now.