My mom beats me and my step dad is a raging alcoholic...ca i move in with my dad? How?

Every once in a while my mom will "beat" me. She's bloddied my nose, tore out chunks of hair, punch me and even beat me with a blow dryer... she says its okay because she was raised like that but idont agree... my step dad drinks like crazy and he had a n affair but talked his way out of it. he doesn't like me too much because i'm always tryng to prove to my mom how he's a huge mistake and to leave him. i want to move in with my biological dad in texas but i dont know what its going to take. i'm 16 years old and i'm a girl. helpppppp

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  • MS
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    You aren't giving anyone enough information to be able to help you, here.

    Does biological dad WANT you to move in with him?

    Do you have anything beyond a Birthday and Christmas "idealized" relationship with him?

    Does he have another family?

    If you don't really know your father, don't pin your hopes on him doing the fairy tale "Ewwwww, come home darling daughter, I'll PROTECT YOU!!" nonsense. He'd have been there before now if that were the case.

    Have you ASKED him about this? Does he know your situation? Be careful--he may just call Child Services and "solve" your problem by getting you slapped into foster care.

    You have several choices before you.

    1. You can call 911 the next time MOM kicks your ahhss. Make sure you're wounded, though--the police want to see bruises. And make sure you aren't hitting back, either.

    Keep in mind you could end up in foster care, and your mom could end up in court, jail and probation.

    Oh, here's a tip for you if she starts hitting--run out into the front yard or the street (if it's not too busy). Yell, "STOP HITTING ME, STOP BEATING ME!!!" at the top of your lungs. Funny how people worry more about what the neighbors think than what their own FAMILY thinks of them.

    2. You can sit MOM down and tell her, straight up, that if she lays another hand on you EVER AGAIN, that you WILL report her to the police. You don't give a rat's ahhs if she was beaten as a child--that's NO EXCUSE. Tell her that you PROMISE if she hits you, you're reporting her to the police. She'll go to court, you'll go to foster care. Tell her you MEAN IT. And then, follow through if you have to.

    3. Her relationship with her husband isn't for you to resolve. She made the sheety deal, she's stuck with it. If you come across compelling evidence of cheating, like say, a video, or a voicemail message, pass it on, but then back off. She probably already knows she picked a loser--you're just rubbing it in.

    4. GO TO YOUR ROOM. For the next two years, when you're not at school, at after-school activities, at your part-time job (don't have one? GET ONE. And start a savings account--you'll need it for when you MOVE OUT), or staying over at your best friend's house, GO TO YOUR ROOM. Make your room as comfortable as possible, so you don't have to leave it. Get a mini cooler for drinks, and put your snacks in your sock drawer .... and keep it clean and cozy. Stay OUT OF THEIR WAY, particularly when StepDad is drunk on his behind.

    5. When you're eighteen, either get gone to college (study hard and apply for scholarships; supposedly this Obama fellow is going to loosen up student loan opportunities too) or find yourself a full time job if you're not an academic lightbulb. MOVE OUT. Start your own life, even if your first apartment is just a tiny studio.

    I wish you luck. You're in a crummy spot.

    You might want to join Al-Anon/Al-Ateen (support group for families/teens with alcoholics in the family--they can help you with coping strategies--see the link). You might make some friends and get a few ideas as to how to manage your life living in that dreadful chaos.

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  • 1 decade ago

    fist thing that should be done is your situation needs to be reported to child protection services or to the police. physical violence against a child is cruel. they will contact relatives for u and see if they will accept u on tempory custody until abuse case can be investagated. your father would more then likely be the first one they call provided u know his number. also call your dad he needs to know about your situation. your mom and step dad need serious help and held responsible for their actions. take action before your mom hurts u soo bad that u end up in a coma, brain damaged, or worse. i wish u luck on this difficult situation.

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  • 1 decade ago

    You need to speak with your real Father immediately and ask if this is possible, if not then you should report this abuse to someone in school.

    It has to stop, someone needs to be responsible for you and maybe your real Father is able to take on this responsibility. Once you have told him everything then hopefully He will be the one to put things in motion.

    But in the meantime speak to someone in authority and tell them how unhappy you are and about the abuse.

    Good luck I wish you well.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Call your dad and talk to him about your living with him. If he agrees, he will petition the court for custody. However, if your mom beats you again, I would call the police and protect yourself. Your mother is a supposedly grown woman living her own life (as crazy as that might be) and you need to worry about yourself. You must keep yourself safe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Good luck!

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  • 1 decade ago

    Call and talk to your Dad. Tell him about your situation. He should know what to do and will probably want you out of that situation. Good luck!

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