I think you're much more normal than you think. I assume you're American, which means that you probably feel some pressure to be a big, tough guy all the time. Truth is, many men are quite emotional, but they work hard to hide it so that they can keep up the macho image that society expects.
How was it for you growing up? Was your stepdad good to you? Have you thought about why you feel insecure about your parents divorce when you were young? If you still hurt deep inside from the divorce, do yourself a favor and talk to a professional about it. It probably won't take so many visits to clear the air about your feelings, because you're ahead of the game by already being in touch with your feelings.
I have a friend who is a psychologist, and she told me about a very interesting conference she attended, which had to do with a study that was done concerning "classic" male and female charateristics. On a sliding scale between 1-10 (1 being the LEAST female or male and 10 being the MOST male or female), most people display some degree of both male and female charateristics. Interestingly, the most well-liked, well-balanced and happy people displayed a nearly 50/50 blend of male AND female traits, whereas people who displayed "pure" male or female traits (1 or 10 on the scale)
were found to be the most annoying people to be around, and therefore had trouble keeping long-term relationships and even jobs!
My own husband's personality characteristics is a perfect blend of male and female traits. He is definately a man, but he's sensitive, "soft", kind, caring, understanding, gentle, and thoughtful - all of which are considered female traits. He has many good friends of both sexes, but he more drawn to females, because he appreciates their natural caring nature.
There's probably nothing wrong with you, physically. You are probably just a "late bloomer". The beard and the raging sex-drive will come when your body is ready for it. But, to ease your mind, go ahead and get tested. As for your worthless doctor, you owe it to yourself to get a new one. If your choice of doctors is limited (like from HMO insurance), then save up your money and pay for a complete physical - including hormone testing - yourself.
Best of luck, and Happy holidays!
· 1 decade ago