Help with my child's friendships..?

Okay, please don't take me as a sterio type of snob. Read my whole question before you judge because I am genuinly a concerned parent. My daughter is at that age where she has started having a lot of girl friends from school. They are coming over to spend the night and have sleep overs etc. My husband and I... show more Okay, please don't take me as a sterio type of snob. Read my whole question before you judge because I am genuinly a concerned parent.
My daughter is at that age where she has started having a lot of girl friends from school. They are coming over to spend the night and have sleep overs etc.
My husband and I make a point to always let the parents know who we are and let them get to know us because you can't be too safe no adays with your children.
My problem is this; the last two times we have gone to the other parents house to pick up their daughter, I was sick! I was absolutley appauled. The filth, the clutter, the pets that one family living in a house too small for the family shouldn't have, like a pet rat!! Come on...who has three small children and has a rat for a pet?
I talked to one of my girlfriends about my concerns and she told me I was being a snob. That maybe they can't afford any better. I don't agree. I grew up poor and my mother always had a clean house regardless!
Update: This last child to spend the night her is ten years old and she is talking about, (humping). I asked her what she knows about that and she said, just what my Mom tells my Dad, "Go hump yourself". OKay....I have talked to my daughter about sex but humping yourself?? Come on, what king of parent says that... show more This last child to spend the night her is ten years old and she is talking about, (humping). I asked her what she knows about that and she said, just what my Mom tells my Dad, "Go hump yourself". OKay....I have talked to my daughter about sex but humping yourself?? Come on, what king of parent says that in front of a child?
I don't know what to do.. I don't want to choose my daughter's friends but I can't handle this!
Update 2: Just so I make this clear okay, My husband and I are not rich. We live in a modest house with one bathroom etc..But it is clean, it doesn't cost that much for a can of Comet!
Update 3: There is a rat, gerbals, three cats, two dogs, a bird, the house is no more than 600 sq. feet and they have three children. Clutter no, filth yes!
Update 4: Okay, for all the people who think I am judging, if I wasn't open minded I wouldn't have let my daughter stay at the last house. She came home crying because she smelled crap and yurn all night! She ended up with a rash that I had to take her to the hospital over. I am a working parent and my house... show more Okay, for all the people who think I am judging, if I wasn't open minded I wouldn't have let my daughter stay at the last house. She came home crying because she smelled crap and yurn all night! She ended up with a rash that I had to take her to the hospital over. I am a working parent and my house isn't always perfect but for a woman that stays home and doesn't work to have the house that filthy I just don't think it is right!! What does she do all day?
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