• Why would a guy not want to date?

    I met this guy a few months ago. We hung out fairly often to start considering our work schedules. Overtime I really started to like him and was under the impression he felt the same. Things seemed to be going well and I always had a great time when we'd get together. He introduced me to many of his friends and normally he invited me to go out... show more
    I met this guy a few months ago. We hung out fairly often to start considering our work schedules. Overtime I really started to like him and was under the impression he felt the same. Things seemed to be going well and I always had a great time when we'd get together. He introduced me to many of his friends and normally he invited me to go out with all of them. I noticed when we'd go out most if not all of his attention was always on me, he would look out and take care of me like no one ever has. I never felt like someone has cared so much. Unfortunately, our contact and hangouts became less and less for no apparent reason. We are both in our mid-20's so I know this may sound naïve on my part, but hes 25 years old and has never had a girlfriend?! Im just wondering why a guy at that age is so reluctant to date. If it means anything, I had a deeper sense of him that he was a bit shy and insecure maybe. But if anyone could explain this to me more I'd appreciate it. I know some guys choose not to date because they've been hurt before, but this guy seemingly hasn't any reason? Im just confused because about the time the feelings set in, he seemed to drift away around the same time.
    3 answers · Singles & Dating · 4 years ago
  • Complicated with long distance?

    Your Open Question Show me another » Complicated with long distance? I ran into an ex of mine from 2 years ago a few weeks back. We dated for a few years (both of our longest relationships), we got engaged, but later ended up breaking things off rather mutually over some arguments we were having. Anyway, I sort of dodged him until he... show more
    Your Open Question Show me another » Complicated with long distance? I ran into an ex of mine from 2 years ago a few weeks back. We dated for a few years (both of our longest relationships), we got engaged, but later ended up breaking things off rather mutually over some arguments we were having. Anyway, I sort of dodged him until he texted me almost immediately after. We caught up on whats happened in the past 2 years and also talked a for a few hours a couple nights following our initial chat. Everything seemed the same as far as how we interacted and we seemed to still be on the same page with all matters. We both admitted to not having been as happy since with other people and some feelings came up along with the possibility of working things out. Unfortunately, he just took a job about 4 hours away, but we ended up hanging out Saturday when he came to visit family. We had a good time, we talked and and one thing sort of led to another. Shortly after, I ended up leaving for fear I'd get attached. Trouble is, I don't think I ever really let go of my feelings for him and they have certainly resurfaced after our talks and hangout. We've had contact since then and while neither of us dont seem to want to let go, he is extremely apprehensive of a long distance relationship since his last failed one. I just got a good job here and hes there, so of course he brought this all to my attention despite my willingness to try this. He also mentioned that hanging out may have complicated things further. My issue is that we both said all of these things and hes even admitted that he WANTED it to work, but stated that it simply wouldn't work out long distance with either of us. Im wiling to wait. Im willing to hangout more and see where things go. I know he feels the same about me and has made several points to contact me knowing how Im feeling about this. The reality is that he was the love of my life and the only one I ever really saw a family with etc. I know he feels the same, but he seems scared. I haven't been the most open about my feelings for fear I will scare him away since I figured we'd take things slow. The whole situation has me sick. Could it work? Is there anything I can say or do? Please be nice.
    1 answer · Singles & Dating · 4 years ago
  • Complicated with long distance?

    I ran into an ex of mine from 2 years ago a few weeks back. We dated for a few years (both of our longest relationships), we got engaged, but later ended up breaking things off rather mutually over some arguments we were having. Anyway, I sort of dodged him until he texted me almost immediately after. We caught up on whats happened in the past 2... show more
    I ran into an ex of mine from 2 years ago a few weeks back. We dated for a few years (both of our longest relationships), we got engaged, but later ended up breaking things off rather mutually over some arguments we were having. Anyway, I sort of dodged him until he texted me almost immediately after. We caught up on whats happened in the past 2 years and also talked a for a few hours a couple nights following our initial chat. Everything seemed the same as far as how we interacted and we seemed to still be on the same page with all matters. We both admitted to not having been as happy since with other people and some feelings came up along with the possibility of working things out. Unfortunately, he just took a job about 4 hours away, but we ended up hanging out Saturday when he came to visit family. We had a good time, we talked and and one thing sort of led to another. Shortly after, I ended up leaving for fear I'd get attached. Trouble is, I don't think I ever really let go of my feelings for him and they have certainly resurfaced after our talks and hangout. We've had contact since then and while neither of us dont seem to want to let go, he is extremely apprehensive of a long distance relationship since his last failed one. I just got a good job here and hes there, so of course he brought this all to my attention despite my willingness to try this. He also mentioned that hanging out may have complicated things further. My issue is that we both said all of these things and hes even admitted that he WANTED it to work, but stated that it simply wouldn't work out long distance with either of us. Im wiling to wait. Im willing to hangout more and see where things go. I know he feels the same about me and has made several points to contact me knowing how Im feeling about this. The reality is that he was the love of my life and the only one I ever really saw a family with etc. I know he feels the same, but he seems scared. I haven't been the most open about my feelings for fear I will scare him away since I figured we'd take things slow. The whole situation has me sick. Could it work? Is there anything I can say or do? Please be nice.
    1 answer · Marriage & Divorce · 4 years ago
  • Do you think I passed my drug test?

    In the past I occasionally smoked marijuana as I do enjoy it. The past few months, I started again, but I only do a few hits anywhere from 2 to 4 days a week. The last few weeks have been pretty sporadiac...probably 4 times in the last 2 weeks. (The most recent was this past Friday). Anyway, I was offered a job a few weeks back and its a great... show more
    In the past I occasionally smoked marijuana as I do enjoy it. The past few months, I started again, but I only do a few hits anywhere from 2 to 4 days a week. The last few weeks have been pretty sporadiac...probably 4 times in the last 2 weeks. (The most recent was this past Friday). Anyway, I was offered a job a few weeks back and its a great opportunity for me so of course I took it. Nothing was ever mentioned about a drug test, so I thought I had everything licked. Today was my first day on the job and they surprised me with a random drug test. 2 hours prior to the test, I chugged about 24oz of water and 20oz of cranberry juice, because I was at a loss of what else to do. I passed urine once before the test. For the actual test, I passed alot of urine and it was almost all clear. I think I have a relatively good metabolism and I do sweat quite a bit. I'm 5'3 110lbs. Going off all this what are your opinions? I'm so paranoid.
    3 answers · Other - Health · 5 years ago
  • Friends with Benefits?

    One of my dear friends was in a friends with benefits relationship on and off for about 2 years. They were friends from long ago, they went to school together, and she always talked about the big crush she had on him. She talks about him a lot, but never admitted her feelings for him, even though in my eyes I thought it was pretty obvious. Anyway,... show more
    One of my dear friends was in a friends with benefits relationship on and off for about 2 years. They were friends from long ago, they went to school together, and she always talked about the big crush she had on him. She talks about him a lot, but never admitted her feelings for him, even though in my eyes I thought it was pretty obvious. Anyway, the other day her and I were hanging out and she texted the guy. He replied, basically telling her that she was "dirty" and that they shouldn't hook up anymore. Hes the only guy she was hooking up with and she told him this on many occasions. I think this is an excuse of some sort, but now my friend is really upset. Why would a guy say this to a girl? If he was hooking up with her, why is she "dirty" all of a sudden? I was pretty mad when I heard he had said this and thought it was completely uncalled for. My friend has always been so nice and forgiving to him and then I saw her cry over this, so Im just wondering why he couldn't of just let her down easy?
    6 answers · Singles & Dating · 5 years ago
  • Ex-boyfriend-PTSD, drug habit & break up? Please give me your advise.?

    I was in a relationship a few weeks ago with a guy who I found out very shortly into the relationship, was abusing prescription drugs. Im no dummy to this type of abuse, it was observed through his behavior and I've also caught him snorting "prescribed" medication on a few occasions. I should mention that he suffers from PTSD, but... show more
    I was in a relationship a few weeks ago with a guy who I found out very shortly into the relationship, was abusing prescription drugs. Im no dummy to this type of abuse, it was observed through his behavior and I've also caught him snorting "prescribed" medication on a few occasions. I should mention that he suffers from PTSD, but during the duration of our relationship, as I really came to care about him, we never talked about this issue. He was not very open about it (not surprisingly), but I did try to ask questions without ever making him feel I was dictating his life. Whether we went out or stayed at home, he would hardly be coherent. Ultimately, I felt alone as I could barely talk to him. On more occasions than not, he'd also drink while doing pills, which was far more than the recommended dose. All in all, I was pretty scared with what he was doing and I subtly made this a point of interest and an issue a few times, in which case he'd avoid my point, as I know this can be a lethal mixture. I got pretty fed up just in the month and a half we were together, but I hoped that something would change. The more he avoided this as being an issue and despite a few arguments that spawned from it, he wont admit that its a problem. I know he is far from getting any better and so I feared for his life. I do not tolerate drugs, I told him this many times. Initially, I told him I would stay with him through anything, yet this weighed down on my conscious the entire time. Other things occurred, always having to do with his problem and I realized that this is not my fight or journey. I broke things off in a mature manner and stood my ground as far as my problem with all of this. I told him I'd be there if he needed anything, mostly I meant that if he wanted to get help, I would be there. I did come to love this man. He is a great person, and very funny. We had some good times in that short while, but he literally was killing the nice aspects of himself with his habit. Hes asked me to accept him the way he is, in other words, he was equating himself with the drugs, which I do not feel is who he really is! He wasn't the nicest person about the break up, he said that I gave up on him quickly and he also brought up the fact that I was telling him I loved him. He said that love is supposed to be unconditional, as I did say I'd stay no matter what. I admit I do feel bad about this all still. I don't know if its the feeling of being lonely again, but I keep getting this feeling that perhaps I made a mistake in breaking up with him, as I do miss him quite a bit. He texts here and there just to make small talk and he also seems to need to be reassured that I am not with anyone else. Hes asked me to hang out which I've agreed to, but have yet to actually do. I don't know whether I should hang out with him at all? I also was wondering what everyone thought of this situation and if I made the right decision in breaking up with him? I feel like I did, but part of me still hangs on to him and what he could be. I honestly thought I could help, as I am the only woman hes dated that did not have a drug problem.
    1 answer · Singles & Dating · 5 years ago
  • Scenario from a girl's perspective: Would you be mad at this?

    You just start dating this guy. Things are going good and getting pretty serious fast. You find out that while you were at work he was hanging out with a female friend who you did not only know were friends, but who has also been pretty snobby to you in the past. When you are with your boyfriend this girl has been around on occassion, but they never... show more
    You just start dating this guy. Things are going good and getting pretty serious fast. You find out that while you were at work he was hanging out with a female friend who you did not only know were friends, but who has also been pretty snobby to you in the past. When you are with your boyfriend this girl has been around on occassion, but they never have hinted at being that close (And by hang out, I mean for some unknown reason she came to his house and they also went to another friend's of yours together). He never tells you about this, but you hear from someone else, who may or may not of been reliable and only trying to create waves, so you dont say much about the situation. Your man and this women proceed to go to a bar together, she drives. Later you meet up with your boyfriend and are informed that hes basically been hanging out with this woman for the last few hours, again while you were working and unbeknowst to you. However, they dont talk much while you are around now. At the end of the night, your boyfriend is walking outside with this other woman. This could look so many different ways, based off what you heard. You dont find out till later that the informant told your boyfriend to walk her to her car, in which case he actually does. How would you take it, if anything what would you say?
    8 answers · Marriage & Divorce · 5 years ago
  • Reassurance please? I did the right thing.?

    Im really just looking for some positive feedback, so please no rude answers. Im asking this in the marriage section so that I'll hopefully get some mature answers. So thanks all in advance. So, last night I did what I think was a very brave and courageous thing. I broke up with someone I love and dated for just over a year. I've dated... show more
    Im really just looking for some positive feedback, so please no rude answers. Im asking this in the marriage section so that I'll hopefully get some mature answers. So thanks all in advance. So, last night I did what I think was a very brave and courageous thing. I broke up with someone I love and dated for just over a year. I've dated longer once before. But everything with this guy started out great. We had lots of fun. He was great to me, we never fought, its like it just worked. Normally this would be a guy that MOST girls would love to have in their lives. Hes hard-working, loyal, dedicated, he really listens. Ontop of that he has goals and loves me dearly. I cant believe I went a whole year though with this guy, when my feelings were never as strong as I once felt. In fact, I broke up with him on 3 other occassions inevitably always feeling the same. Since everything was so good, I felt like I had to sort of force myself to love him the way I should and then try to show that. I thought maybe one day, I'd wake up and love him in that way, but you cant help your feelings and after a year, I felt it wasnt trying for a change of heart anymore, it was more like wasting time. I got extremely busy, I started making less and less time for him. We'd maybe hang out once a week and even then it felt like a job. Our relationship felt like a competition. I realized with all that happened, he was harboring alot of jealousy. He was a bit controlling and extremely stubborn. There was alot of things I could of picked a fight over that most women would to be honest, but I hardly cared to have a fight when I wasnt feeling invested 100%. It broke my heart to break his, but none of it was fair to him or me. Im in my mid-20's trying to get a career established. I want to go back to school, and while love has always been a priority, I didnt see me forever with him. Our values are very different. He took things to my surprise very easy after at first not really accepting or respecting this break up I asked for. I gave him his stuff, watched him walk away and knew it was over for good this time. Anyway, Im just looking for some reassurance about the decision I made. I know it was right, but no breakup is easy and I do feel bad. Any support and positive things to say are appreciated.
    7 answers · Marriage & Divorce · 5 years ago
  • I have a boyfriend but...?

    Im in my mid-20's and I've been with the same guy for little over a year now. Hes extremely good to me and we never fight. In the past, I could honestly say I was head over heels in love with only one guy. Trouble is, my feelings for my current boyfriend are no where near what I felt before with my ex. As if that doesnt feel bad enough, I... show more
    Im in my mid-20's and I've been with the same guy for little over a year now. Hes extremely good to me and we never fight. In the past, I could honestly say I was head over heels in love with only one guy. Trouble is, my feelings for my current boyfriend are no where near what I felt before with my ex. As if that doesnt feel bad enough, I have some other issues with the relationship, but that I wont go into. All in all, I just feel like I wont end up with this guy for the long haul. In the past, I broke up with him 3 times, but I think out of sympathy I went back to him, when I probably shouldnt have. Basically, the break ups came down to my lack of feelings that even now, after a year, are not up to par and not progressing. Anyway, I was out with some friends last night and started having a conversation with a male acquaintance. Hes extremely good looking and has a great personality. I basically spent the whole night laughing and talking with this guy and it was so genuine. I'll admit I was really flirting with him just really feeling something different and like we were hitting it off. Today, to my hope, he added me as a friend on facebook and I made a little joke about the night before. We went back and forth until he messaged me his number and said I could text him, so I did. He asked me to hang out, but I told him I'd be really busy. He said if I wasnt later maybe we could hang out then. I know its awful, but I really feel like I want to get to know this guy. Again, I think this shows my lack of feelings for my boyfriend. With my ex, I never felt interested in other people and thats how it should be. I feel so nervous and know that if I hang out with this guy (obviously not even hooking up), but while Im with my boyfriend, I'd still be doing something wrong. I was never really in this postion before and I need some advice. I dont know if this is about whats right or wrong, or what I want, but I just dont know what to do. I dont want to string my boyfriend along if I decide to find out if things will happen with this other guy (he just got out of a relationship too), but in a way I feel like thats what I've been doing this whole time. My boyfriend really loves me, I just dont feel the same. What do I do? I feel sick over this situation.
    3 answers · Singles & Dating · 5 years ago
  • Guys/Girls: Would you be mad? Did I over-react?

    Yesterday I had an extremely long day. I had yet another boring training for my new job that I despise and then I had to go to work afterwards for a long shift. Lately, I've been feeling a little down in the dumps about this job, its been so far, extremely stressful and not fulfilling, but its a start. I've been sticking it out and... show more
    Yesterday I had an extremely long day. I had yet another boring training for my new job that I despise and then I had to go to work afterwards for a long shift. Lately, I've been feeling a little down in the dumps about this job, its been so far, extremely stressful and not fulfilling, but its a start. I've been sticking it out and applying elsewhere in the meantime. Other that that, I've been trying my best to make time for my boyfriend despite my odd hours and feeling exhausted since I work almost everyday. Yesterday, I had a awful day at work (no surprise there) and told my boyfriend I'd be going home to have some dinner (I was starving) and then heading to bed (we dont live together). He was fine with this, he knows my job gets to me, but we hardly discuss it. Sometimes I feel like Im screaming inside about it. Still, I try not to bring my issues around him and just relax when Im with him, but some days Im just tired and go home. Anyway, yesterday I knew he didnt have work. He doesnt work full-time, so whether its his day off or not, he usually has time to nap at some point in the day regardless and will usually eat, sleep, eat, sleep etc. I've been with him long enough to know this is his pattern in the day. Anyway, I didnt get off of work last night till 11pm, I told him I loved him when I was about to get off and go home. And then he asked if I loved him enough to pick him up a pack of cigarettes and drop them off? He lives down the street from my work, but even then I flipped! I was furious that he knew how tired I was and that all I wanted to do was go home to sleep and eat, something he had the luxury of doing all day! He waited till 11 oclock at night to ask me just when I was getting off my shift to go get him cigarettes and bring them to him!? I told him he had all day to do that, but thats when he said he had been out, Im assumming drinking with his friends, which he does several nights a week, while Im at work. He then made a comment, which I assume was a drunk one, saying basically since I was saying "hell no, Im not getting you cigarettes!", that "how can he trust his future wife then?" I then freaked out even more, telling him its not the 1920's and if he wants to find a wife thats going to do things that he can perfectly well do for himself he better find some stupid woman willing to do it for him or live home forever (he lives with his overbearing mother). I was extremely angry, work aside, and all he said was "WOW". I said sorry.. and went to bed. Low and behold, hes obviously not to happy with me today, but out of the blue, hes been asking me lately to do things for him like this. Would you be irritated or did I overreact?
    1 answer · Singles & Dating · 5 years ago
  • Schizophrenic Client..Am I right or wrong?

    I started a new job about 3 months ago working one on one with a midly MR woman, but who is also schizophrenic. The agency I work for refuses to put her in the mental health program despite that this is where most of her issues come from because of the budget. This woman is considered a danger to herself and others and lately has been becomming... show more
    I started a new job about 3 months ago working one on one with a midly MR woman, but who is also schizophrenic. The agency I work for refuses to put her in the mental health program despite that this is where most of her issues come from because of the budget. This woman is considered a danger to herself and others and lately has been becomming more brave and inventing new ways to create a more dangerous environment. Currently all glass and forks have been removed from the site. Shes openly told me that she wants to be back in the psychiatric hospital. I firmly believe that she will continue to do worse things until that wish is fulfilled. My agency does not allow for their to be any consequences as they consider it "abuse", but I spend the most time with this woman and Im required to take her out. Most of the time, I feel very panicky and scared in my work enviornment. In the least bit, I feel this is not a siutuation that should be one on one. There is an upcomming staff meeting, I have the intention of mentioning that this woman wants to be back in the hospital as this is where she spent many years. I feel this is the only real comfort and safety she has felt in her life. Being new and all, I am skeptical about bringing this up, however, the other people I work with hardly have to deal wit this woman and I think they are worried about being out of work, which I also feel is ignorant. My question is, if you think it would be okay to bring this up if you were in my shoes? If you ask me, the agency is being greedy in keeping this woman in society, which not only goes against her wishes that Im not sure everyone is aware of, but in my mind, someone who wants to hurt people should not be around people! Do you think I am right?
    1 answer · Psychology · 5 years ago
  • Will I be able to get pregnant? Please read.?

    Im in my mid-20's and Im starting to have baby fever. Alot of people I went to school with are getting pregnant (not on accident anymore) and or are married. I feel a bit pressured sometimes, but of course I want to wait a few years until Im better off finacially, but I still hope to have a family some day. But heres the thing..I've... show more
    Im in my mid-20's and Im starting to have baby fever. Alot of people I went to school with are getting pregnant (not on accident anymore) and or are married. I feel a bit pressured sometimes, but of course I want to wait a few years until Im better off finacially, but I still hope to have a family some day. But heres the thing..I've always been petite. Im about 5'4 and my weight ranges between 103-110. 110 is the most I've ever been and I dont exactly eat healthy. I eat whatever and whenever I want, I just dont seem to gain weight. Ontop of that, back in October I had an issue where I had an ovarian cyst that had ruptured. I went to the E.R., I was in excruciating pain and thats when I got the news. I was on birth-control for having irregular periods, but went off it for awhile and I was back to normal before my periods stopped once again after a few months. Needless to say because of the cyst I am back on birth-control. Given all this, am I at a serious disadvantage for getting pregnant in the future? My mom swears I wont be able to because of the cyst and also because of my weight and this really upsets me. So Im just curious. Any information would be appreciated. Thanks all.
    2 answers · Women's Health · 5 years ago
  • I hate dating Momma's boy..?

    My boyfriend had a father who was abusive toward his mother. My boyfriend has openly admitted to having to step in on some of these occassions even as a small child. In some ways, I do understand this as I also grew up around domestic violence however, it seems that after his mother divorced, the relationship between mom and son has become extremely... show more
    My boyfriend had a father who was abusive toward his mother. My boyfriend has openly admitted to having to step in on some of these occassions even as a small child. In some ways, I do understand this as I also grew up around domestic violence however, it seems that after his mother divorced, the relationship between mom and son has become extremely unhealthy in my eyes. For one, I cannot stand this woman. I think she is manipulative in how she keeps him attached to her, claiming she is 100% dependent on him and also how she will push him toward things that are to her benefit. Much of this has to do with money, something she is always seeking out in the many boyfriends she's had since him and I started dating, but she always finds something wrong with every man. This is also something she has sought out for him as well, hence she always wants to tell me about how Im ONLY going to make X amount of money provided my career path. In this way and many others I feel she is always downgrading me and making me feel I am not good enough for her son. Shes told me so many things I wont even go into detail with, but the fact of the matter is, it is always about her and always in her snobbish tone when it comes to me. I truly believe she thinks I am trying to take her son away. I understand mother and son relationships, but she tries to compete with me when im not even playing the game. She is in her mid 40's and aside from having no friends, she is well. She claims to have many degrees yet she just started working and even then its a PRN job. He pays for half if not most of everything. I found out when I dont stay over, she will sometimes sleep in his bed because she is lonley. Hes 24 and admittedly so, is in no way shape or form, ready to leave the nest. He said simply, "I cannot leave her". Shes mentioned plans to go elsewhere and I know he will follow. He later tried to talk me into that plan as well, claiming it was his idea. When we talked about having a home of our own one day, he further mentioned her living with us. I've had a dream to continue my education out of state and at this point its the most logical thing I can do to better myself. Ineveitably, I know we are going to be driven apart by this. He cant be too far from his mom for any lenght of time. The second he is with me, she will call multiple times. I dont see this pattern changing, I am mentally preparing to run, not walk, in other direction. Do you think I am right for feeling this way? Should I even hold out until we are driven apart, or is it best to do it now? Im sorry but this situation is exhausting. Again, I am not trying to drive a wedge between them, it is his mother, but I thought at this point he'd be excercising some independence and as a 40 some year old woman how is she not? I dont think he will ever get off the apron strings.
    7 answers · Singles & Dating · 5 years ago
  • I hate dating Momma's Boy..?

    My boyfriend had a father who was abusive toward his mother. My boyfriend has openly admitted to having to step in on some of these occassions even as a small child. In some ways, I do understand this as I also grew up around domestic violence however, it seems that after his mother divorced, the relationship between mom and son has become extremely... show more
    My boyfriend had a father who was abusive toward his mother. My boyfriend has openly admitted to having to step in on some of these occassions even as a small child. In some ways, I do understand this as I also grew up around domestic violence however, it seems that after his mother divorced, the relationship between mom and son has become extremely unhealthy in my eyes. For one, I cannot stand this woman. I think she is manipulative in how she keeps him attached to her, claiming she is 100% dependent on him and also how she will push him toward things that are to her benefit. Much of this has to do with money, something she is always seeking out in the many boyfriends she's had since him and I started dating, but she always finds something wrong with every man. This is also something she has sought out for him as well, hence she always wants to tell me about how Im ONLY going to make X amount of money provided my career path. In this way and many others I feel she is always downgrading me and making me feel I am not good enough for her son. Shes told me so many things I wont even go into detail with, but the fact of the matter is, it is always about her and always in her snobbish tone when it comes to me. I truly believe she thinks I am trying to take her son away. I understand mother and son relationships, but she tries to compete with me when im not even playing the game. She is in her mid 40's and aside from having no friends, she is well. She claims to have many degrees yet she just started working and even then its a PRN job. He pays for half if not most of everything. I found out when I dont stay over, she will sometimes sleep in his bed because she is lonley. Hes 24 and admittedly so, is in no way shape or form, ready to leave the nest. He said simply, "I cannot leave her". Shes mentioned plans to go elsewhere and I know he will follow. He later tried to talk me into that plan as well, claiming it was his idea. When we talked about having a home of our own one day, he further mentioned her living with us. I've had a dream to continue my education out of state and at this point its the most logical thing I can do to better myself. Ineveitably, I know we are going to be driven apart by this. He cant be too far from his mom for any lenght of time. The second he is with me, she will call multiple times. I dont see this pattern changing, I am mentally preparing to run, not walk, in other direction. Do you think I am right for feeling this way? Should I even hold out until we are driven apart, or is it best to do it now? Im sorry but this situation is exhausting. Again, I am not trying to drive a wedge between them, it is his mother, but I thought at this point he'd be excercising some independence and as a 40 some year old woman how is she not? I dont think he will ever get off the apron strings.
    2 answers · Psychology · 5 years ago
  • Would you be annoyed by this or am I being irrational?

    My boyfriend and his mother have been on their own since he was was young. They moved all around to different countries, I assume in search of success. When my boyfriend was 12, they moved here to the U.S. for a good education. My boyfriend is 24 years old and we've been together almost a year now. We are pretty serious and we've already... show more
    My boyfriend and his mother have been on their own since he was was young. They moved all around to different countries, I assume in search of success. When my boyfriend was 12, they moved here to the U.S. for a good education. My boyfriend is 24 years old and we've been together almost a year now. We are pretty serious and we've already talked about moving out in the future as we both still live home, which I thought was only a matter of finances. Heres the thing, I do not like his mother. She always has snide comments about the major I took up in school and seemingly tries to compete me with things like money (none of her business), jobs, etc. and I think she believes, Im taking her baby away so to speak. Awhile ago, his mother brought up to me HER "5 year plan". Again with her snobbish attitude she tells me she was only planning to stay in this area a few years and then move out of state. A few months later, my boyfriend starts talking about a plan to go there and how I should think about it too. At that point I had to ask whether that was his plan or his mothers, he assured me it was his. Meanwhile, I've had a very different dream. I wanted to temporarily live in an entirely different state to continue my education for many valid reasons of my own. I've put alot of thought in to it and I promised myself I wouldnt give up on that on account of a guy. When I asked him about considering that instead, he started choking up and told me "I cant leave her", meaning his mother. His mother and him always say how its always been just them. In some ways its nice as they've had the luxury of moving around, but they also like to use that to bash this country, which seriously annoys me as well. On top of that, she also tells me how dependent she is on her son, "and I mean 100%". My boyfriend pays for nearly half if not more of everything. In her little competitions with me, she'll also have to tell me about all these degrees she has, yet she just started working PRN. She has no friends and is constantly dating new guys, but she always finds something wrong with them. Shes been married twice, once I know was for money, as she seems to be obsessed with rich men. Once she even tried pushing my boyfriend toward dating a woman who was a Dr. That said, she always telling me that Im only going to make X amount of money with my degree. I dont think my boyfriend is ever going to get off the apron strings and I find this putting us at odds more than not. Wherever she goes, I know he will follow. When we talked about moving out, he also said that perhaps his mom could live with us for at least 6 months?! She is in her mid 40's and well, why and how could she live being dependent on her son at this point? the way he talks about these things is disgusting, I think she almost has him brain-washed into thinking how much SHE needs HIM.
    6 answers · Marriage & Divorce · 5 years ago
  • For advice on love etc?

    Hi all. So I have this idea to create a website basically where I would give advice to people on love, sex, marriage, relationships, family, and parenting. How this would differ from yahoo etc. is I would include blogs, surveys, opinion questions, gender differences, book recommnedations, daily facts etc. I was thinking about starting to get some... show more
    Hi all. So I have this idea to create a website basically where I would give advice to people on love, sex, marriage, relationships, family, and parenting. How this would differ from yahoo etc. is I would include blogs, surveys, opinion questions, gender differences, book recommnedations, daily facts etc. I was thinking about starting to get some followers via yahoo where people can chose to remain anonymous. In this way, people can receive indepth answers to ALL their questions as it would be a bit more personal. What is your opinion on my idea? I was also thinking of including my boyfriend ( he said hes up for it), this way guys can feel free to join as there would also get the male perspective. What are your suggestions? Do you think its a good idea and what would be a good website name?
    1 answer · Singles & Dating · 5 years ago
  • Creating a website. Opinions and advice?

    Hi all. So I have an idea to start a website basically where I would give anoynmous people advice on love, sex, marriage, and relationships. I was thinking of including blogs, surveys, opinion questions, daily facts/advice, and book recommendations etc. I am a woman with a degree in psychology with emphasis on gender differences, family, and... show more
    Hi all. So I have an idea to start a website basically where I would give anoynmous people advice on love, sex, marriage, and relationships. I was thinking of including blogs, surveys, opinion questions, daily facts/advice, and book recommendations etc. I am a woman with a degree in psychology with emphasis on gender differences, family, and marriage/relationships. I was later going to include my boyfriend to keep things fair and so that guys can also feel free to join. What is your opinion on a site like this? Does anyone have any suggestions? What do you think would be a good name for the website?
    2 answers · Gender Studies · 5 years ago
  • What options do I have left?! Question about student loans etc.?

    I was suppossed to graduate in May 2012 with a Bachelor's in Psychology with plans to continue my education. Low and behold, I was short ONE credit for graduation and its costing me 2,000 dollars for ONE class! I went through hell with my school. I could not get finacial aid because I wasn't as least part-time. I continued going to class... show more
    I was suppossed to graduate in May 2012 with a Bachelor's in Psychology with plans to continue my education. Low and behold, I was short ONE credit for graduation and its costing me 2,000 dollars for ONE class! I went through hell with my school. I could not get finacial aid because I wasn't as least part-time. I continued going to class and for months tried to get all kinds of loans, in which I had no luck, co-signer or not. My graduation date is in Decemeber and I cannot even receive my diploma until my balance is paid. With my educational background and experience, I am only currently receving 9 dollars an hour pay. Even then, I offered to make payments, but the school insists that the amont be paid in FULL prior to my graduation, which is not a possibility for me. I am not in school for the time being so that is another issue. I cant understand what the difference is between me, someone willing to pay on my balance and someone who received a deferrment until after graduation?! The best part is my school is saying that I graduated in May! So they want me to start repaying my other loans ontop of this and they even included a 200 dollar graduation fee, plus the bill keeps accumulating interest. I have average credit, my parents have excellent credit, but already have out extensive loans for my brother's education, which is why I cannot get a loan. I feel out of options at this point and Im extremely upset I cant get a diploma that I worked so hard in earning! Any suggestions??
    3 answers · Financial Aid · 5 years ago
  • I have an issue with my boyfriend masterbating! Please help.?

    I took some space from my boyfriend for a week after feeling exhausted with my new job etc. Although, I'll admit I was feeling frustrated with him as well, I didnt blame him and he was very understanding of it all. After having some much needed space, I feel more connected with him and things are going great in every aspect. I can tell its the... show more
    I took some space from my boyfriend for a week after feeling exhausted with my new job etc. Although, I'll admit I was feeling frustrated with him as well, I didnt blame him and he was very understanding of it all. After having some much needed space, I feel more connected with him and things are going great in every aspect. I can tell its the same from him. Since the little break, my boyfriend and I have been extremely turned on with one another as you can imagine. (We both already have high sex drives and a very active sex life). Trouble is, I noticed hes been taking alot longer to get off and sometimes not all. That was the case last night and probably the second or third time out of about 4 occassions when we had sex. (Not getting off at all). I know he is not cheating, but last night I got rather upset about this as it is hard not to see myself as the cause. I figured Im a bit rusty (even though its only been a week), but then he admitted to having masterbated yesterday afternoon, which is why I assume he couldnt get off last night. He proceeded to tell me he gets horney in the afternoon, which Im rarely available during those times. I understand "solo" time (I have mine too), but now I feel it is affecting our sex life! Im upset that he cannot get off with me and or that we must go entirely too long for him to actually orgasm, in which case I start to hurt. Lately, he'll be asking that I give him oral in order for him to finish, which I get nothing out of. Or like last night for example, he tired out and gave up altogether. Thats when he preceeded to tell me about his "afternoon time" which I guess happens pretty regularly. Ontop of that he joked about it even though my self-esteem isnt the greatest now just because of this. After last night I questioned him and expressed being upset about the whole situation. I didnt ask that he did this, but he said he was going to promise himself not to masterbate as often since I said it obviously affects sex with me. I should mention that he doesnt have a problem getting turn on and will consistently try to have sex with me, but yet hewont be able to get off! I know him to not be able to go a second round, yet he masterbates knowing were going to hang out later. Even after his promise to himself, hes taunting me now and telling me about how hes turned on at home currently and says "whoops". This kind of behavior is what makes me ask for space. So whats your opinion on this and whats your advice?
    4 answers · Marriage & Divorce · 5 years ago
  • Is it time to break up? If so how?

    I'v been with the same guy for about 10 months now. On 2 or 3 ocassions I broke up with him, inevitably always feeling Im not that into him. Based on an ex (not saying he was the greatest), but I remember feeling much more in love and I did see forever with him. Now Im incapable of feeling the same with my current boyfriend and I've never... show more
    I'v been with the same guy for about 10 months now. On 2 or 3 ocassions I broke up with him, inevitably always feeling Im not that into him. Based on an ex (not saying he was the greatest), but I remember feeling much more in love and I did see forever with him. Now Im incapable of feeling the same with my current boyfriend and I've never wanted or asked a guy for this much "space" in my life. To be honest, I've been blowing him off the last few days and havent had much communication with him. I dont miss him or feel like I care. Honestly, I just started a new full-time job, I have goals, and plans that I dont see him a part of. Im too wrapped up in my own stuff to care to have a boyfriend right now, which is amazing we even lasted this long! I feel terrible for dragging this out or feeling like Im wasting both of our times, but feeling bad is what has always made me go back to him. Dont get me wrong, hes honest, respects me, and takes me out etc., but he admitted he doesnt trust me? Theres a host of other things that I dont like and have been apparent to me for the past 10 months and truthfully, Im getting older and dont see me being able to deal with those issues that I wont get into. Something I should mention, is I feel like the man in this relationship. Hes overly sensitive and its almost scary that he'll do almost to stay with me. I think he knows, I wish not to be with him, but he made a few excuses for the way I feel a few days ago. I have been feeling like this for awhile, but its just now really starting to bother me to where I cant take it. I get anxious and know I have to make a move, but like I said he will NOT take this lightly. He'll want to drag it out more, send me on a guilt trip, and excessively try to talk to work things out. I dont feel like dealing with it. What makes this hard is I see him as one of my girl friends, so that I know I will have to give that up on account of this, but I cant force myself to like someone the way I should feel about a boyfriend. I complain more about him than I dont. Has anyone had any experience in a similiar situation? Whats your advice? To break up no or not? The longer I wait, the worse it will be. Sometimes I feel like just putting it off and letting things fade out.
    4 answers · Marriage & Divorce · 5 years ago